chuck

chuck

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To Be Continued: Something that needs saying…

Hi Kids!

Sorry I’ve been away for so long, but I’ve been busy, getting on with my new life.

So, we can now vote early here in New Mexico, and a certain Republican has stuck his foot in it, and this whole bit, and he, may become irrelevant any day.

So on the eve of the 2nd Presidential Debate, I give you:

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

November 8th, 2016

In an alternate reality, very similar to our own…

And what will he say on election day, once enough of the votes have been counted, and FOX NEWS has declared he won?

“America, YOU’RE FIRED!”

Long stare into the camera.

“I don’t believe how stupid you are!

“How the hell did this happen?

“Here’s how.

“So, I’m at this retreat for rich white guys out West someplace, you know, the one run by those two brothers, and a few other rich old, white guys.

“A group of them comes up to me, takes me into a private room, and they says, ‘You know, we think you oughtta do it. You oughtta run for President.’

“I practically spit out my drink, and I says to them, I says, ‘You really think they’d vote for me? You’re crazy. I fake fire people on television. I’ve been bankrupt more times than I can count. I’ve got a list of failed businesses that the American people ended up paying for. I’m a clown. Nobody will ever vote for me!’”

“And they look right back and say, ‘We can do it. We’ll make it happen. All you gotta do is show up, yell at some people that we plant in the crowd for a half hour, 45 minutes, tops. Then you do the speech. Talk about how bad everything is, insult the local politicians, complain about immigrants and illegal aliens.

“‘Yeah, tell `em you’re gonna build a giant wall, y’know like on that Game of Thrones show, all across the Mexican border, and you’ll make Mexico pay for it!’

“And another guy says, ‘Yeah and you gotta really go off on a religion, too. Let’s see… Oh yeah, I got it, Islam. Make all the Muslims nervous, and scare the public with stupid claims about terrorists, and ISIS. Really work the people up. You’re the best at that! Make `em scared, and start your followers lookin’ at those guys funny, like they’re all a buncha criminals!’

“And this little guy pipes up and says, ‘Tell him about the race thing!’

“And the other guy gives the little guy a look like he’s gonna slap him, and says, ‘Calm down, I’ll tell him. We think it’d be fun if you started a race war. You know, start spoutin’ off White Supremacy stuff, get David Duke and some of them White Power militia types on our side. But no Nazis. Too obvious. That’d be too much. Thing would crumble like a house of cards.’

“I says, ‘Guys, this sounds like a bad science fiction novel. Nobody’ll believe it.’

“You know what they said then? Get a load’a this!

‘”If it don’t work out”, they says, `and nobody buys our line of bullshit (that’s what they said, bullshit. Don’t gimme that, they say it on TV!), as long as you can keep it goin’ for a few months, we’ll have lots of footage of your (air quotes) campaign (close air quotes). Then, we just edit all the footage and turn it into a comedy reality show: Your life on the Road to The White House. That’s a pretty good title, eh?’

“`We’ll throw in some family stuff, and plenty of that hot wife of yours, that’s for sure. We’ll do a Real Housewives thing with her and all her hot girlfriends. C’mon, It’ll be a laugh!’ they said.

“A laugh. Are you laughing America? Any of this seem funny to you?”

“See, I was thinkin’, just run it `til April Fools Day and declare the whole thing was just a bad joke. But then it started gettin’ interesting, so I figured I’d play it out. It was a joke!”

Long hard stare right down the throat of the camera with that snarky “You’re fired!” look.

“So America, you get the idea, I never wanted to be President. I just wanted to see just how far you’d go, you idiots! You’re FIRED! I ain’t doin’ it!”

Another stare.

“What, you’re gonna go with my running mate? He’s a bigger idiot than I am. When you let THAT slide, I started wondering how bad it was really gonna get, so I ran with it!

“I’ll do one thing as President. I’ll declare a DO-OVER! Maybe you’ll get it right the second time!

“Then I’ll retire on that $475,000 pension, you morons. You NEVER saw this coming? Seriously?

“You all need help. Hey, there’s my next fortune. Cheap psychiatric help from the graduates of The DRUMPH Psychiatric University! We’ll get Doctor Laura on staff, maybe Doctor Phil, too. Yeah, and we’ll do our own financing. I’ll get rich, AGAIN!”

Mic drop. Walk off stage.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Stay Well.

Your pal,

Chuck

The Final (okay, might never be really final) Chapter Two of Savage Investigations, The Novel: AfterMatth

Hi Kids!

Here it is, Chapter Two, AfterMatth, of Savage Investigations, the novel I started back in February of 2005. I know I spelled AfterMatth wrong but it’s a play on words, using that poetic license us writers have the right to use:

Aftermath Matt, AfterMatth, get it? Of course you do.

Less than a month (actually 21 days) after I finished the final, final (really final) Chapter One.

At this rate, I should have those 5 chapters ready for sale (at 99 cents, a steal) on amazon and at www,larntz.com easily by Christmas.

Dominique is going over it as I type, so any minute now, I will copy that sucker into this post and you can read it for FREE. That’s right, I said FREE. I read that the one thing that gets everybody’s attention is the word “FREE!” With an exclamation point, even more so. FREE!

We found a couple of corrections, so there’s that never gonna be the final, final, blah, blah, blah…

 

Here it is!

Probably ought to get serious now. This is solemn stuff…

 

TWO

AfterMatth

 

Savage watched with horror as the large monitor went blank. The voice monitor and biometric displays flat-lined. The other monitors displayed the fireball erupting out the top of the blast shield and the smoking hole in the ground where the two kids stood. The blast shield was still erect but covered with bloody fragments of Matt’s body armor and bits of Giovanna’s clothing.

Matt and Giovanna were dead because the primer charge detonated.

Savage sat dumbstruck, wracked with guilt, staring at the blank monitor and the flat line that seconds ago was a beating heart.

He wondered for the first time if the bomb suit would have protected Matt from the smaller charge, a question that would haunt him for the rest of his days.

“My God,” he thought to himself, “did I just kill those kids?”

“Chief?” came the voice from his headset. It was Master Sergeant Orrin Mickelson, Savage’s choice to be the onsite commander.

“I don’t know Johnny, he’s not responding.”

In the background, Savage heard Johnny say, “C’mon Mick, he’s gotta be there.”

“Chief! Are you there? Do you copy?” Mickelson half-shouted into his mic.

Savage snapped out of it.

“I’m here, Mick,” Savage said, unscrambling his thought processes.

“Gather up all the crime scene evidence you can, you know the drill. Set everything up in Hangar 243, it’s empty,” Savage added.

A light on the secure desk phone started to flash.

“Hold on, the secure line is ringing.”

He picked up the receiver.

“Savage. This is a secure line.”

“Savage, do you know who this is?”

“Yes, sir.”

“And why I’m calling?”

“Yes, sir.”

“I’ve called in the cleanup crew and your people can’t be there when they show up. Clear them out immediately.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Oh, and Savage, sorry about your man.”

“Thank you, sir.”

The line went dead.

“Mick, you need to evacuate the site. Leave everything and get back to the base. You know what I’m saying, right?”

“Uh, yeah, we copy.”

“And Mick, Team Building at my place after you get back. Let yourselves in. I’ll be there as soon as I finish up here.”

After an op, Savage and his boys always went back to Savage’s villa to unwind and compare notes. They called it a “Team Building Exercise”. It was especially important when they lost a member of the team.

Savage completed the most painful Operations Report he had ever filed and left the command center.

He made his way home to his villa, Northwest of Sorrento.

Walking through the gate and up to the house, he looked through the window at the men assembled in his living room. The same men, minus one, who just a few hours ago were laughing and celebrating the missing teammate they were here to mourn.

MSgt Mickelson met him at the door with a cup of black coffee.

“I know how close you and Matt were. You okay, Chief?” Mickelson asked.

“Not really, Mick. Sorry I flaked on you, but this hit me pretty hard.”

“No, it’s all good, Chief. You came back pretty quick, considering.”

“I guess you got the call, huh, Chief?” MSgt John Johnston, the team logistician, asked.

“Yeah Johnny, he called so you guys had to bug out,” Savage said.

“So what the heck happened?” asked TSgt Billy Ray Simon, the team weapons expert.

“I reviewed the footage. The primary charge went off before Matt could cut the leg of the ballast resistor,” Savage offered. “I don’t think there was anything he could have done.”

“Yeah, I heard him say something about the crappy soldering job,” Mickelson said.

Staring at nothing in particular, Johnston said, “Makes you think about how quick life can be snuffed out and how unfair it is to a guy like Matt, who may be the nicest guy I’ve ever known.”

“Yeah, but that’s EOD. Walking on the edge of destruction. You’re right Johnny, it’s not fair, but neither is life,” Simon mused.

A cloud of solemnity hung over the rest of the gathering as they swapped stories and memories of Matt, and some even managed a few weak smiles.

It was near dawn when the last man left and Savage fell into a fitful sleep at about four-thirty.

He was rousted out of bed at six a.m. by the phone.

“Savage,” he said into the phone, his voice clouded by sleep.

“Chief, this is Captain Armstrong. Colonel Harding requests that you report this morning at o-eight-hundred.”

“Yes sir,” he said, shaking the cobwebs from his consciousness. “I’ll be there.”

He dragged himself into the shower.

He arrived at the outer office of Colonel Richard Harding, the installation commander, and Savage’s direct superior.

“Go right in, Chief,” Armstrong said without looking up from his desk. He wanted to express his condolences, but said nothing because he knew what was waiting on the other side of Harding’s door.

“Thank you, sir,” Savage said as he passed the adjutant’s desk.

Harding’s door, which to Savage’s recollection had always been open, was closed. Savage stopped in front of it for a moment to compose himself.

He stood at full attention and rapped once on the door.

“Enter!” came the brusque reply from the inner office.

Savage took a deep breath and let it out slowly before he twisted the door handle and entered.

He noticed that the two chairs that were always set at 45 degree angles to each other across from Harding’s desk were gone. They had been replaced by a lone straight backed chair, placed four feet away from the front and center of Harding’s desk. In addition, there was a video camera set up on a tripod and an operator a few feet to the side and behind Harding’s desk to record the interview. This was not to be a social visit.

Savage snapped to attention in front of Harding’s desk at 0759 with a sharp salute and a curt, “Sergeant Savage reporting as ordered, SIR!”

“Sit down, Savage,” Colonel Richard Harding said from behind his huge cherry wood desk. As the military installation commander, Harding was responsible for everything that happened with respect to the U.S. military under his command.

“All right then. Let’s get this started,” Harding said. The anger in his voice was palpable. “Mitchell, start recording,” he said to the video technician. The flashing red light on the front of the camera went constant.

“Savage, since this is an official inquiry, you have the right to counsel in your defense. Do you wish to have counsel present?” he asked. The tone of his voice was all business.

Savage sat at attention in the chair across from the colonel’s desk. “No, sir, it won’t be necessary.”

“Let the record show that Sergeant Savage has waived his right to counsel,” he said to the camera.

Harding’s anger flashed in his eyes. He knew Matt and was fond of him, since Matt had often taken the colonel to task on the racquet ball court.

This incident was indefensible.

“Your report on the fiasco that went down last night. The Italian government wants someone to answer for that girl’s death.

“What the hell were you thinking, allowing Swanson to go in without the bomb suit?”

“Sir, as I stated in my report, Sergeant Swanson suggested there wasn’t time to suit up, and in my opinion, the situation warranted the breach of regulations.

“Considering the outcome, the bomb suit would not have been much protection, anyway.”

“All right, I’m willing to overlook that for now, but you and I both know Swanson cut the wrong wire. It’s an obvious mistake, yet there’s nothing in your report that says so. It also states that you want to give him the Air Force Cross? Why?”

 “Permission to speak freely, sir?”

Savage was a Chief Master Sergeant and had achieved as much rank as possible in the enlisted ranks as an E-9. He had five years more time in service than the colonel, and at age 43, was a year older, but Harding was an O-6 and military protocol dictated that enlisted always defer to an officer.

Since they were in uniform and Harding had summoned Savage to report, all military protocols had to be followed. They had become close friends over the years Harding had been the Base Commander. Had they been out of uniform, on the golf course, at the gym, or at the club together, they would have been on a first name basis. “Permission to speak freely” took them off the record.

“Of course,” Harding said, and then to the camera operator. “Pause the recording, Mitchell.”

The red light on the camera pulsed again.

Savage rose from the chair and walked up to the desk. He leaned across the desk on his hands, his face a foot away from Harding’s.

“Rich, I don’t believe it was a mistake. You know—knew—Matt. He wasn’t at fault. I think he is—was—the best EOD guy in the business, with more citations for bravery and excellence than almost anyone I know. He was a professional and died in the commission of his duty. That’s why I’m pushing for the Air Force Cross. If we say he made a mistake, he won’t get it. I can’t let that happen. The only conclusion I can come up with is shoddy wiring, because he never got the chance to make that final cut. Thank God, he managed to disable the vest before it blew.

Harding held up a DVD.

“This is a copy of the events as they happened, recorded from the Ops Center console you were sitting at,” he said, sliding the DVD into the computer on his desk. He used the mouse to activate the video display. The monitor came to life and showed a split screen display of each of the monitors that Savage had seen last night. Harding clicked the mouse again and the displays froze.

“Swanson’s reputation is not the issue here,” Harding said. “Hell, I recommended him for most of those citations. The fact is, somebody is going to get hung out to dry on this. If not Swanson, as the OPCOM, it’ll be you.”

“So be it. I’m responsible. I made the call to go without the bomb suit. I was the one in charge.”

“Drake, be reasonable. Matt’s death was tragic, but he’s dead and you throwing yourself on this sword isn’t going to bring him back.”

“Rich, can I show you something?”

Harding slid his chair away from the desk as Savage walked around behind it and took control of the computer. He sped up the recording to the point just before Matt was about to cut the wire.

“Now watch this,” Savage said. “See how the wires are all the same color? There’s no way for a lay person to tell which wire he was about to cut. In fact, he wasn’t going to cut a wire, but the negative leg of the ballast resistor. Look at those cold-soldered joints. He even said something about the substandard construction job. I don’t think he ever got a chance to make that cut.”

He pressed a key and the static display came to life. His voice came from the computer speakers.

“Matt, if you don’t think you can do it, leave it alone. You’ve disabled the majority of the bomb. We can make her comfortable and bring in somebody else. She’s relatively safe now.”

“Aw shucks, and leave this pretty little girl wired to explode? I couldn’t do that, Chief. Nothing I can’t handle. It’s a matter of pride, y’know? We’ve come this far, you gotta let me finish it.”

He heard his own voice again, “All right, but be careful.”

“Okay, one last thing, and we’ll all go home. Don’t you just love happy endings? Me too.

“Just cut this leg of the ballast resistor, and we can all go home—“

The larger of the displays, Matt’s point of view, showed the open jaws of the wire cutters about to make the final cut.

The larger screen went blank and the other three displayed the event that was now burned into Savage’s psyche. His stomach clenched.

Savage held up his finger.

“There! Did you see it?”

“See what?” Harding said, confused.

“The jaws of the wire snips never closed on the leg of that resistor. Did you see it?”

“I don’t know. Play it again.”

Savage reversed and played the scene again frame by frame, freezing the image at the instant before Matt’s helmet camera screen went blank, clearly showing the open jaws of the wire cutters hovering over the resistor before the other displays showed the explosion.

Savage asked, “Do you see it?”

“I do,” Harding admitted.

“Exactly!” Savage exclaimed. “This is proof that he never got the chance to cut the wire. The thing went off before he could disarm it! It may have been on a timer, or it could have been bad wiring. You can see how sloppy those connections are. Or maybe a remote detonation, but for whatever reason, Matt never had the chance to cut that wire!”

Harding looked thoughtful.

“You might be right, Drake, but she was the Italian Minister of Finance’s daughter. The Italians are still going to want someone’s head for this.”

“Give them mine. We can’t let them have Matt’s,” Savage said. “He doesn’t deserve to go out that way.

“Rich, Matt died trying to save that girl’s life and I can’t, in good conscience, let his death go unrewarded. The least we can do is give his brother the satisfaction of knowing his little brother died a hero.”

Harding stared into Savage’s eyes as he pondered destroying his career.

“Okay, I’m convinced, but we both know what the bureaucrats are going to say happened. He was nervous because she was a diplomat’s daughter and he choked,” Harding insisted.

“I don’t think so. Not once you show them this. He didn’t seem nervous to me. I didn’t hear it in his voice. Matt Swanson’s been part of my team for five years, Rich. His voice monitor showed normal right up until he went for that final cut. You can see it on the biometric display. His heart rate and respiration were perfectly normal.

 “You’ve known Matt Swanson almost as long as I have. Did he sound nervous or afraid to you?”

Harding shook his head.

“You and I know better, but the bureaucrats don’t know him. They’re still going to say he caved under the pressure,” Harding protested.

“I believe he knew what he was doing,” Savage said, “and the primer charge went off prematurely. He said it was a poorly rigged device.

“Imagine what would have happened if he hadn’t first disabled the main charge. Instead of a big hole in front of the gate, we would have lost the whole building, half of the block around it, and my team. For that, he is a hero.

“It was an accident. It wasn’t Matt Swanson’s fault. I want him to get the Air Force Cross for gallantry in action. He really deserves the Medal of Honor. I can’t let his memory be tainted on my watch!”

Harding broke in, “Even though we have visual proof that he never cut the wire, videos can be edited, and the Italian government can say the video was tampered with.”

“Then it’s our job to convince them otherwise!”

Savage realized he had balled up his fists. Harding noticed, too.

“Look, Drake, somebody is going down for this and I don’t want it to be you,” Harding pleaded. “You’ve had a long and distinguished career. I heard you tell him to leave it alone. He was being insubordinate.”

Savage nodded at Mitchell, who looked at Harding. Harding nodded his consent. The camera’s recording light glowed red again.

“Sir, with all due respect,” Savage said, regaining control and switching back to military protocol to make his point, “neither of us were there, but we have proof that he did not make a mistake. The video record clearly shows that he never had the chance to cut the wire that would have disarmed the device. You can see on the video that the jaws of his wire cutters were open and hovering over the detonation device at the time of the explosion. Sergeant Swanson was the best EOD specialist I’ve ever known. He would not make a rookie mistake like this. Everything was going fine until the bomb went off. I could hear it in his voice. He was not nervous or hesitant. He also said that it wasn’t anything he couldn’t handle. Consider what would have happened if he hadn’t first disabled the main charge, the vest of explosives. Instead of a big hole in front of the gate, we would have lost the whole building, half of the block around it, and my team. For that, he is a hero.

“Sergeant Swanson gave his life while trying to save the life of another, an innocent, terrified, young girl. That’s what I want the record to state.”

He paused for effect.

“The fact is,” he went on, “I was at fault. I used poor judgment, and as a result, two young people are dead and we are on the verge of an international incident. If the Italian government needs someone to blame, let them blame me. As you said, Colonel Harding, I was the OPCOM. I could have ordered Sergeant Swanson to stand down, but I didn’t. Court Martial me. Give me an Article 15. Force me to retire. Just don’t let my mishandling of the situation stain the honor of a brave young man who gave his life in the service of his country.”

One of the rights and responsibilities of a high-level position in the military such as installation commander is the ability to perform both field promotions and demotions in the form of the Uniform Code of Military Justice, Article 15, Non-Judicial Punishment. Savage’s solution would be the perfect way out of this mess and they both knew it.

The colonel thought for a moment, weighing all the factors. This was already a political hornet’s nest, and could very well become an international incident, unless he could find a scapegoat to give to the Italian authorities. The Black Ops crew had already covered everything up, so a thorough and public joint investigation was going to be out of the question.

On the record, Savage had just offered his own neck for the chopping block and Harding needed to decide whether or not to drop the axe and sever his career.

Given Savage’s spotless record, Harding didn’t want him to be drummed out of the military, but he respected Savage enough to accede to his wishes.

“All right, Chief. If that’s the way you want it. Effective immediately, you are out-processing for retirement, and you are hereby demoted to the rank of E-8.

“End recording, Mitchell,” the colonel said to the camera operator. The red light went out.

“I hope it’s enough to satisfy the girl’s father,” Harding added.

“So do I,” Savage agreed.

One of the less glamorous aspects of being a diplomat was the knowledge that something might happen to a loved one, which is why they are so well guarded around the clock. A covert investigation, which Savage would have been an integral part of, would reveal exactly what happened to the girl’s security people. He knew that since he was no longer privy to such information he would never know the truth because due to the classified nature of the incident, none of the personnel involved in the investigation would be able to reveal any details to Savage as a civilian.

The official story for the media was that a suicide car bomb blew up at the gate of the embassy. The Black Ops cleanup crew, whose job it was to rewrite history and cover up what actually happened, gathered all the evidence, hosed down the site, and brought in a car loaded with explosives with a cadaver behind the wheel. They blew it up at the front gate, taking down the gate and a section of fence, right after Savage’s crew left. An hour later, it was all over the major wire services and television.

The world media all carried the same story.

He heard the news while in the Outprocessing Office at the Military Personnel Flight that afternoon.

 “Our top story, Crimson Jihad, a new terrorist group, is claiming responsibility for the suicide bombing of the United States Embassy in Naples last night in retaliation for American air bases and military presence in the Middle East. Fortunately, due to the late hour of the attack, other than the driver, there were no casualties.”

“We are Crimson Jihad. We will no longer tolerate the Capitalist American Invasion. Death to the American pig-dogs who would desecrate our sacred holy lands with their machines of war and destruction. This is our first message. There will be others.” droned the monotone English translation dubbed over the frantic Farsi shouting on the tape.

“Crimson Jihad, eh?” Savage thought to himself. “Probably an Army Captain who’s an Arab translator. And why, with all the modern technology and advances in audio in the world, does it sound like it was recorded in a cave?”

He wasn’t wrong. The voice of Crimson Jihad was a Farsi translating U.S. Army Lieutenant from Kansas, recorded on a cheap cassette recorder, his mouth too close to the microphone, and he was in a bathroom stall. The tape was sent to the embassy and released to the media. The attack would be viewed as another skirmish in the war on terrorism.

Nothing was ever reported in the world news about the abduction and subsequent death of Giovanna Francelli, or the brave young man who lost his life attempting to rescue her. Neither government wanted anybody getting ideas about kidnapping the daughters of diplomats. Only a handful of people knew the truth about what had occurred. Giovanna’s death was explained away as a riding accident.

“In other news,” the Armed Forces Network newscaster solemnly reported, “Giovanna Francelli, age 15, the daughter of Finance Minister, Armando Francelli, died yesterday in a tragic accident when the horse she was riding threw her, sending her over the side of a mountain path to the rocks below, to her death. And now, here’s the weather…” the newscaster said, decidedly more upbeat.

The true nature of Giovanna’s death and the heroic young man who died while trying to save her would be forever shrouded in secrecy. Savage hoped the official Italian investigation might reveal what happened to Giovanna’s security detail, but he would never know.

He was fed up anyway.

“23 years in the military, 18 of it in black ops. I’ve lost enough close friends, and had enough of death, subterfuge, and lies,” he thought with acrimony in his heart. The world and tragically, Matt’s brother, must never know the true circumstances of the bravery and selflessness for which his little brother had given his life.

While he was outprocessing, Savage signed his retirement papers. Harding taking one of his stripes meant he would be retiring as a Senior Master Sergeant, but he would still receive the full retirement pay of a Chief, and “CMSGT / E9” would be displayed in the “PAY GRADE” field on his retiree blue ID card, and he would be receiving more than $3,000 a month for the rest of his life, but that brought little comfort at the moment.

Someone else would have to watch over his boys now. Maybe Harding would promote Mick to Senior Master Sergeant. He was ready.

They all came over to his place for Savage’s final team building exercise. It was a somber farewell gathering, unlike the one they had held for Matt just last night.

“Y’know, they say that those EOD boys just do the job for the crazy thrill of cheating Death every time they go out, but not Matt. He was one the most level headed guys I’ve ever known. No crazy in that boy, that’s for sure,” said TSgt Simon.

“Yeah, I’ve seen him talk guys down off the edge of crazy when they’d been drinking too much, and avoid incidents with the cops,” MSgt Mickelson said.

“And you couldn’t find a nicer, more genuine person, always ready to help out or pitch in,” said TSgt Johnston.

Savage raised his glass for the last time to toast Matt Swanson with the team.

“We are all better men just for having known him. To Matt.”

“To Matt,” the team said as one.

“And here’s to you, Chief. We hate that you’re going, but we know you’ll land on your feet,” said TSgt Anthony “Dollar” Bill, the team heavy equipment specialist.

“Thanks, guys. I’m really going to miss you, too. I have every confidence that you will all go on to greatness in your own ways. If you ever need a reference, let me know. I can lie as good as the next man,” he laughed. “Seriously though, I’ll send you my details when I get where I’m going, and please, keep in touch.”

Savage knew he’d miss the life and the camaraderie that exists nowhere else except the military, but now it was time to move on.

Though unprecedented in his experience, Colonel Harding granted Savage’s final request to take the physical Air Force Cross medal to Albuquerque and personally give his condolences to Matt’s brother, Albuquerque Police Department Detective Sergeant Luke Swanson.

His exit from the military turned out to be a whirlwind affair. The paperwork that normally took up to six weeks was pushed through channels in a few hours.

 A transoceanic flight later, Savage had his final out-processing appointment stateside at Dover Air Force Base, Delaware. Later that afternoon, he would be officially retired and no longer part of the military.

He had a flight to Albuquerque scheduled for 0845 the next morning.

With a little more than forty thousand dollars in his 401K, his future was, for the first time in a very long time, uncertain.

******************************************

***********************************************

Okay, here you have it.

Now on to Chapter 3!

Do let me know what you think by replying to the post on facebook or send me an email to chuck@larntz.com or chucklarntz@gmail.com.

 

Thanks for reading, and for your support.

 

To be continued…

The Final, Final (really, final?) Chapter One of Savage Investigations: the Novel

Hi Kids!

Well, here it is, the final rewrite of Chapter One: Goodbyes, I think, dare I say hope?

I’ll let you be the judge…

 

ONE

Goodbyes

 

“Matt, we’ve been through a lot together in the past five years. Are you sure there’s nothing I can do or say to get you to sign up for another hitch?”

“Afraid not, Chief,” Matt laughed. “It’s time for me to be moving on.”

“It’s just that, well, we’ve kind of gotten used to you. What if your replacement turns out to be a jerk?”

“What can I say, Chief? I know you and the boys will straighten him out.”

This brought a round of laughter from the others seated around the table.

Chief Master Sergeant Drake Savage was the head of a highly trained U.S. Air Force Special Forces Anti-Terrorism team. Their business was to prevent, if possible, and if not, be the first to respond during and after terrorist attacks in Southern Italy. For the past few weeks, business hadn’t been very good, and that suited them just fine.

They were gathered for Staff Sergeant Matt Swanson’s going away celebration at Franco’s, the little trattoria the team had come to think of as their second home. Franco had closed the place hours ago and they had it all to themselves. He was sitting at another table away from the revelers, doing the daily receipts.

“Yeah, but are you really sure?” Savage asked. “It’s not too late. I can get those discharge papers torn up.”

“Chief, I’ve only got a week before I go back to Albuquerque to be a good cop like my brother. They’re holding a spot for me on the APD bomb squad. I’m gonna miss all you guys, but it’s time for me to move on to the next level. Besides, since our folks passed, you know that Luke’s the only family I have left.”

Having demonstrated an aptitude for Explosive Ordnance Disposal training during the Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery testing process, he was the team’s EOD Specialist. Over the course of the last six years, he had devoured any updated training material and the latest techniques in bomb diffusion technology he could find. Matt had become one of the most skilled explosives technicians in the Air Force. He was proud of his many accomplishments and the rest of the team felt lucky to have him. On the job, it wasn’t just his life on the line, and in EOD, there are no second chances.

Savage raised his glass of sparkling water for a toast. Being on-call 24/7, the team didn’t drink, as they never knew when a clear head might be needed.

“Matt, you know I have to keep asking. You’re just too good to let go lightly. I keep hoping you’ll change your mind, but if you won’t, I suppose I can live with it. All I can say is, the Albuquerque P.D. had better know how lucky they are to get you.”

Savage raised his glass higher, as did the rest of the team.

“So, as much as it pains me to say it, here’s hoping you have a long and fulfilling career protecting the folks back home.”

“Hear, hear!” the team exclaimed in unison.

There was a sharp knock at the door, and Franco went to open it.

Peering through the curtain, Franco looked back over his shoulder at Savage, “I think it is for you, Drake,” he said as he opened the door.

A uniformed lieutenant and a major strode into the restaurant, nodded at Franco, and walked up to Savage, who rose from his chair, and snapped to attention. The major spoke quietly with Savage. He nodded, and then addressed his men.

“We’ll have to pack it in, boys.” He turned to Franco, “I’m afraid we have to leave, my friend. We have work to do.”

“Is okay, Drake. Just be careful,” Franco replied with concern in his voice.

Franco had a vague idea what it was that Savage and his team did. He knew they were military and their job could be dangerous. More than just good customers, over the nine years he had known Savage, it was as if he and his crew had become part of Franco’s extended family. Besides, they were excellent tippers.

The team placed a large stack of euros on the table, much more than the cost of their meals and hurried out of the restaurant. They climbed into the government van that was waiting outside.

Savage took the seat behind the driver, facing the rear door, and briefed the team on the five mile trip back to the base.

“Okay, here’s what we’ve got so far,” he began, “Italian Minister of Finance, Armando Francelli’s daughter was kidnapped from her private school in Rome early this afternoon. She’s currently standing a few feet from the curb in front of the entrance gate to the American Embassy in Naples, wearing a vest wired with enough C-4 to blow up a city block.  Since this is such a high profile op, all eyes, ours and theirs, are going to be on this job. We have to do it by the numbers.”

He pulled a picture out of a file folder and passed it down.

“Meet Giovanna Francelli. Twenty minutes ago, a white van pulled up to the curb outside the embassy, pushed her out, and drove off. The gate guard took this shot right after she was ejected from the van and stumbled up towards the guard shack. No markings on the van, tinted windows, and the plates were strategically covered with mud.

“She’s technically on American soil since the grounds of the embassy extend to the curb, so it’s our job. We have to assume she’s remotely wired, and the Carabinieri have cordoned off a ten-block area surrounding the embassy. It’s mostly warehouses and office buildings in that neighborhood, so there won’t be a lot of traffic at this time of night. Fortunately, nobody’s called the news services yet, but it’s only a matter of time.

“Matt, you will disable the bomb.”

Matt studied the picture of Giovanna Francelli and winced when he saw the terror in her eyes. She looked so helpless.

“Chief, how old is this girl?”

“She’s 15, Matt, why?”

“And she got picked up how long ago?”

“Around 1330 this afternoon. What are you getting at?”

“I want to do this without the bomb suit.”

“Didn’t I just say, by the numbers? Why would you want to do that? That goes against every regulation in the book,” Savage said.

“Because for one thing, it takes 20 to 30 minutes just to get in the damned thing, and if the bomb’s on a timer, that’s time she may not have. She’s been a hostage for what, more than 10 hours now? Who knows if they fed her. She might be hypoglycemic. Another thing, that much C-4 is pretty heavy so she’s gonna be unstable on her feet.  If they have it rigged to a mercury switch, any unnecessary movement will set it off. That may be why they just pushed her out of the van and left. The bomb suit itself is a scary thing, and I’m afraid it would scare the bejesus out of her. This is a delicate op and needs a personal touch. She needs to be able to look in my eyes and I want to see hers. In that thing I look like a cross between the Michelin Man and a killer robot from outer space. The last thing I want her to see is her own distorted reflection in the face mask of the bomb suit. She’s a scared little girl, Chief, and all it will take is just one false move. That much C-4 is gonna blow me and the suit to bits anyway, in addition to everything else within a two block radius.”

Savage had to agree. Behind the face shield, the wearer’s face was completely obscured. The bomb suit itself was clumsy, and the amount of protection it afforded in this case would be nil.

Against his better judgment, Savage allowed the breach of regulations. He knew he’d catch hell for it if anything went wrong, but Matt was right, the personal touch might save the girl’s life, and that would be worth a little bureaucratic butt chewing.

“All right, but you are at least going to wear body armor with a helmet cam and headset,” Savage informed him.

“Yes, sir,” Matt smiled.

Savage always led his team into the fray, but since this was such a high profile operation, he was ordered to stay behind and coordinate from the command center on the base.

They arrived back at the base and Savage said, “Do me proud, boys. Everyone will be watching.”

“Right, Chief!” they all said as one man.

Savage got out of the van and went into the Operations Command Center.

There were two armored transports loaded and ready nearby. His team climbed in and set off for Naples.

At 0137 hours, the team, sans Savage, arrived on the scene and set up a perimeter and a mobile command post.

Matt donned his helmet with the lipstick camera and microphone headset affixed to the side and exited one of the transports.

He stood for a long moment and surveyed the scene, giving Savage a chance to take it all in from the array of monitors at the console back at the command center.

Standing on the sidewalk a few feet from the curb, in front of the entrance gate, the girl looked so alone in the harsh white light of the spotlights that illuminated the embassy grounds.

Giovanna Francelli was tall for her age and a little gangly. She hadn’t yet grown into her height. She had huge brown eyes and over the next few years, would grow into a statuesque beauty, but now, unsure of herself and self-conscious, she always stood somewhat stoop shouldered, hunched over to be closer to the same height as her peers.

Crying and afraid to move, she sobbed softly.

Giovanna still wore her school uniform, a blue, green and yellow plaid, knee-length skirt and white cotton blouse. The blouse was covered by the vest of plastic explosives, and one of the sleeves was ripped. Her white knee socks were torn and dirty, and her once shiny, black, Mary Janes were scuffed. She had a bruise over her left eye where one of her captors had struck her.

Matt saw the bruise and it enraged him. He thought about the coward who had hit her and wished he could get the brute alone.

He pushed down his anger, put on his best thousand watt smile, and walked up to the girl. He stood very close, establishing eye contact, his gaze never wavering from hers. She was terrified and exhausted. He was afraid she might pass out and blow them both to bits.

He thought fast.

“Parlate inglese?” Matt asked in a soothing voice. While not fluent, he tried to at least learn enough of the local language to get by.

The poor girl was trembling.

“A little,” she half whispered.

“Heck, I’ll bet you speak better English than me,” he continued, smiling his warmest, most reassuring smile.

He took a bottle of water out of his pouch and offered her a sip. She flinched like a scared rabbit when he first touched the bottle to her lips, but she drank cautiously. He set the bottle down and reached for her hand, turning up the wattage on his smile. He held her hand in both of his, but said nothing, maintaining his focus on her eyes.

“Thank you,” she said timidly.

“What is your name?” Matt asked, knowing that it would make her think of something other than the situation.

“Giovanna. It means ‘God is gracious’.”

“Yes, Giovanna, He certainly is,” Matt agreed and closed his eyes for a moment in silent prayer, continuing to hold her hand.

Via satellite, Savage was wired directly to Matt’s helmet cam and headset. A secure link to the security cameras atop the embassy presented a full 180 degree view of the front gate where Matt and Giovanna stood, holding hands like a couple of school kids. He zoomed in with the slider switch until both of them filled the three monitors in front of him, with Matt’s helmet cam on the fourth monitor in the center of the array. This monitor was larger and had a full color display, and monitored the stress level of Matt’s voice, showing a biometric display of his cardiac functions. Savage actually had a better view of the scene and was able to assemble more information than if he were on site. Except he wasn’t there, and that troubled him.

It was hard to lead from a bank of video terminals and a headset, but the men on his team were seasoned professionals and he had the utmost confidence in them.

“Boys, let’s get everybody out of that building,” Savage ordered. The team sprang into action.

At that late hour, there was only a skeleton crew working in the building. They were escorted out and to a safe distance two blocks away, loaded on buses, and transported to safety.

A few minutes later, the team had set up a staging area 20 yards from the embassy entrance gate. They set up an eight-foot tall polycarbonate blast shield, surrounding Matt and the girl. In the event of an explosion, the polycarbonate would contain the force of the blast, which would theoretically geyser straight up and not out to the sides. Just outside the door of the blast shield was an explosion-proof bin mounted on a specially made cart with large balloon tires and special shock absorbers.

“Now Giovanna, I want you to take a deep breath very slowly, and let it out. Then we’ll see about getting this thing off you so you can go home and see your Madre e Padre, okay?”

Some of the fear faded from her eyes as she thought of her parents. She nodded, inhaled deeply and exhaled. Her trembling subsided a bit.

“There’s nothing to be afraid of. I’ve done this a thousand times,” Matt exaggerated.

The confidence in his voice made her relax a little more.

“Matt,” Savage said into his microphone. “give me a sit rep.”

“Everything’s gonna be fine, Chief. This vest will be a piece of cake.”

Giovanna looked puzzled to see Matt talking to himself.

“Es mi capo, my chief,” Matt said, pointing to his ear. “He’s in my ear.”

She nodded uncertainly.

Matt took off his helmet and placed it on the girl’s head.

On the large monitor her face was now replaced by Matt’s.

“Say hello, Chief,” he said.

In his most calm and comforting voice, Savage said, “Ciao, Giovanna. Non preoccupar. Matt, e molto buon a che cosa fa e lui li conserverà.”

Giovanna’s shoulders relaxed even more.

Matt replaced the helmet on his head. The combination of the confidence in Matt’s voice and the soothing words in her native tongue from Savage had calmed her.

“What did you say to her, Chief?” Matt asked, amazed at the change in the young girl’s demeanor.

“I told her you are very good at what you do and you are going to save her,” Savage said. “Now, don’t make a liar out of me and get to work.”

“Yes, sir,” Matt said, smiling with thousand watt confidence.

Matt looked into Giovanna’s eyes again.

“Here we go. Are you ready?”

Giovanna nodded.

“One more deep breath.”

Together, they inhaled deeply and exhaled.

“Now hold very still, Giovanna, and we’ll get this thing off of you.”

From his pouch, he pulled out a self contained, mini ultrasonic scope, similar to those used in hospitals, but on a much smaller scale. It looked like a flashlight with a translucent convex lens on one end, and a three-inch monitor on the back of the scope that he used to locate the wire that connected the detonation device to the vest. It wasn’t a mercury activated switch, but there was a small, featureless, black shape under the vest that he knew housed the detonation device and the chip that was the brains of the device. The drawback of the ultrasound scope was, because of their molecular density, metal, wiring, and electronic components only displayed as black lines and featureless black shapes, while less dense materials such as explosives showed as translucent gray, revealing the electronics behind.

Unable to tell if there was a timer, he worked quickly.

Matt disabled the C-4 laden vest, opened the door to the blast shield and placed it in the explosion-proof bin. Two men raced up and quickly rolled the cart away. Without a firing source, the explosive was only a little more dangerous than modeling clay.

Both Matt and Giovanna breathed a sigh of relief with the deadly vest gone.

Next, he went to work on the primer charge, a plastic box hanging around her neck. He checked it with the scope. Inside were a few wires leading to and from a small printed circuit board, what appeared to be a nine-volt battery with two wires coming from the top, and a black rectangle about the size of a deck of playing cards, the primary C-4 charge.

Ensuring there was no trip switch that would detonate the charge if he removed the lid, he carefully pried the top off the box. Sandwiched between two layers of the plastic explosive was a thin metal conductive plate maintaining continuity with the battery. If he tried to just pull the wire out, it would detonate. He’d have to cut the connection to the ballast resistor connected to the wire to the negative terminal of the battery, breaking the connection, but the battery was completely wrapped in black tape, obscuring the positive and negative terminals.

The other problem was that all the wires were the same color, the color of dried mud.

“Chief, you gettin’ all this?” Matt whispered into his headset. “This is a strange one. Look at this sloppy wiring and these crappy cold-soldered connections. Amateurs, y’know? Must’ve had a sale on brown wire down at the terrorist electronics store, too,” he chuckled.

“Matt, if you don’t think you can do it, leave it alone. You’ve disabled the majority of the bomb. We can make her comfortable and bring in somebody else. She’s relatively safe now,” Savage cautioned.

“Aw shucks, and leave this pretty little girl wired to explode? I couldn’t do that. Nothing I can’t handle. It’s a matter of pride, y’know? We’ve come this far, you gotta let me finish it,” Matt pleaded.

Against his better judgement, Savage agreed, “All right, but be careful.”

Matt withdrew a surgical scalpel from his pouch, cut the tape from between the top terminals of the battery, and peeled the tape back, revealing the negative wire leading to the ballast resistor.

“Okay, one last thing and we’ll all go home. Don’t you just love happy endings? Me too,” he said, replacing the scalpel in the pouch and bringing out a delicate pair of wire cutters.

Matt’s helmet camera displayed the scene as he brought the wire cutters up to the wire he was about to cut.

“Just cut this leg of the ballast resistor, and we can all go home—“

Deafened by the roar of the explosion for a nanosecond, as Matt’s headset and camera were incinerated by the blast, Savage watched with horror as the large monitor went blank. The voice monitor and biometric displays flat-lined. The other monitors displayed the fireball erupting out the top of the blast shield and the smoking hole in the ground where the two kids stood. The blast shield was still erect but covered with bloody fragments of body armor and bits of Giovanna’s clothing.

 Savage wondered for the first time if the bomb suit would have protected Matt from the smaller charge, a question that would haunt him for the rest of his days.

*************************************************

 

 

Well, there you have it, Kids.

Could you please read it and let me know what you think by sending me an email to chucklarntz@gmail.com?

I would sure appreciate to feedback.

 

Thanks,

 

Stay Well,

 

Your pal,

 

Chuck

GOOD COFFEE!

Hi Kids!

Got something that I wrote just a few days after I retired, and yesterday I realized that I hadn’t shared it with you yet.

It’s a little one page, four-panel ditty that would be ideal for “string“, 7000 BC’s we-publish-it-whenever-folks-have enough-new-stuff-they’re-working-on-anthology so folks can see what we’re all currently doing.

It’s based on a line I’ve been using for years to describe what happens when you take a sip of a good, strong cup of coffee (my favorite kind, even if it’s decaf–especially if it’s decaf…). You know, something I’ve been meaning to put down on paper, but just haven’t had the time or the opportunity, and now, I have both!

So, here it is:

GOOD COFFEE!

PANEL 1

CLOSEUP OF COFFEE MUG (OLD TIME DINER STYLE) BEING RAISED TO A PERSON’S LIPS, MAYBE STUBBLY CHIN, MORNING BEARD, OR A WOMAN’S FACE. KINDA LIKE THE STUBBLY CHIN BETTER…

PANEL 2

AS THE CUP REACHES THE LIPS, A MIGHTY, BROWN AND SHINY ARM AND FIST MADE OF COFFEE RISES OUT OF THE CUP AND

PANEL 3

SOCKS THE DRINKER IN THE NOSE! MAYBE SHOW A BIG “POW!” IN THE CENTER OF A CONCENTRIC STAR LIKE THE OLD TIME COMICS USED TO USE.

PANEL 4

PULL BACK TO FULL FACE, EYES WIDE OPEN, COFFEE CUP AT CHIN LEVEL.

“WOW! GOOD COFFEE!”

 

Hyuk, hyuk, hyuk, eh?

Thanks fer lookin’!

Your pal,

 

Chuck

 

To be continued…

It’s Voting Day in New Mexico, California, and Four Other States!

Hi Kids!

Well, here it is, voting day in New Mexico and several other states, not to mention California, so I just want to remind all of you out there in those states, and everyone here in New Mexico, to get out there and vote for Bernie Sanders, the President we NEED, and the Democrats that support him, because he’s gonna need all the support he can get when he’s elected. You wanna talk about “The Party of NO” with Barack Obama, wait’ll Bernie gets in there and they try to stonewall everything he tries to do that doesn’t benefit the billionaires and the corporations. I know Bernie will stand strong and fight back, something that I don’t think Barack did enough, but it’s in the past now, and it’s a new day, or at least it will be.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and ask that if you are going to vote for Trump, or Hillary, please let me know. Especially Trump, because I want to know why you hate America. Please, let me know why you would want such a dangerous person in charge of the most powerful country in the world.

In fact, if you’re not voting for Bernie Sanders, the President we NEED, and the Democrats who support him, why not?

He is that most elusive of rare birds, and honest politician. Why would you not want an honest politician as President of the United States? He doesn’t owe anybody any favors, or unlike Hillary, any corporations. He isn’t even a millionaire. He’s just an average person, like you and me, who wants to fix what’s wrong with our country.

If you’re not voting for Bernie, then I suppose the vast wealth inequality in America, is okay with you? It’s okay that a person working three jobs, still isn’t making enough to support his or her family, while the CEO and the upper echelon of those companies is making in more in one hour, than that person makes in a whole month? You think that’s okay?

People not having access to quality health care and dying as a matter of course because they were unable to be treated since they couldn’t afford to pay the most inflated prices in the world for basic healthcare because if it comes to paying for housing (rent or mortgage), gas in the car, and groceries, there’s just not enough left to pay $1000 a month to keep their family healthy. More heinous is the fact that even if you are paying that $1000 a month, that healthcare corporation is routinely going to deny your claim, so unless you appeal, maybe have to hire a lawyer, if you can afford it, so their lawyers can rip your lawyer to shreds if your case even gets to court, but you’re still paying that $1000 a month so you have health care

That’s okay with you, too?

How about the fact that one child in five will go to bed hungry tonight?

Or people are going to die because of the heat this summer because they can’t pay their utility bills?

You don’t have a problem with any of this?

What is wrong with you?

Meet Drake Savage

Hi Kids!

Thanks for joining us.

Today we’re having a “True Confessions” kind of thing goin’ on.

Let me explain:

Ever since I started writing Savage Investigations, my technique for editing is to jump in and start changing stuff and then saving the changed version as whatever day it is when I’m editing. That way the original is still intact, just in case I decide later, “Oh, what a fool I was to change that! Bring it back!” It’s still there, so no worries, even when it kinda sucks or is less than what I really wanted to say. The seed of the idea is still there…

What comes next is the very (or darn near) first draft of Chapter One from way back in the oughts, 2005, to be exact, back when the world was new and so was I…

I read it over last night and realized how far I have come as a writer in 11 years, and thought I would share it with you, warts and all.

Be warned: It’s quite warty, and horribly adjective and cliche-ridden! But hey, I hadn’t read Stephen King’s brilliant On Writing yet and was just starting out, y’know?

I found this early draft quite amusing, and then I realized that this is pretty close to the version of my manuscript that I showed my friend, David Lloyd (Google him), when we first met that July, during Jake’s and my first International Comic Con in San Diego. He was so very kind and offered no criticism, aside from the fact he didn’t like the name, “Drake Savage”. He said “Drake” was too uncommon and folks might not be able to relate to the character, and suggested “Joe” or Frank”, or another more common, and more relatable name, so I set out to justify Drake’s name by having him be an abandoned baby in the wee ours in the lobby of the Drake Hotel in Chicago, and then adopted by Frank Savage, the Night Manager at The Drake and his wife, Lydia, who wanted a baby so bad, but was alas, barren back in 1973, when fertility was a mystery.  It appeared that Frank and Lydia would be child barren until the night that Drake’s homeless, unwed mother, left him in a basket on a table in the lobby of The Drake Hotel, with a note pinned to the blanket saying something to the effect of “Please give my baby a better life than I could.”

Back in `07, more or less, I wrote the first eight pages of a comic script called, “Meet Drake Savage” as the first in a series of introductory comics to all the major characters in the Savage Investigations universe. I have a vague outline of how to finish the comic with Frank and Lydia adopting Drake, and the hotel chain owner, Conrad Hilton himself, seeing the P.R. nightmare as a wonderful marketing opportunity, making little Drake the mascot of the hotel, putting Frank and Lydia up permanently in one of the lesser suites, rent free, and a bunch of other stuff that I can’t remember right now (but I know I have it written down in here somewhere…), ending in their tragic death in an elevated train accident, throwing nine-year-old Drake into the Social Services Child Welfare system, resulting in a criminal incarceration at age 17, forced to join the military or go to jail. Drake, being the clever kid he was, chose The U.S. Air Force, where he blossomed into the heroic terrorist investigator that actually brings him to Albuquerque, to become Drake Savage, Private Eye, and owner of Savage Investigations.

Whew! That’s a real House That Jack Built, huh? Hope now that you know the whole story, you’ll still buy the books, or at least, keep it to yourself. Mum’s the word, eh?

Now here’s another little known fact about Drake Savage, and the main reason I wanted to keep the name. He was a character that I created back in the late 80’s or early 90’s as a costume for a party: Drake Savage, International Man of Mystery and Billionaire Philanthropist.

This guy:

TheREALDrakeSavage

 

So, without further adieu, let me embarrass myself and bare my practically virgin, creative soul for your reading pleasure and amusement. Please, be gentle, and I hope you’ll still respect me in the morning…

 

************************************

ONE

The sign on the door says “Savage Investigations.” While it may sound like he’s an anthropologist, he’s not. He’s a P.I. A private investigator, a gumshoe, a shamus. Even in the 21st century there’s a place for guys like him. People still need other people followed. Husbands want to know if their wives are being faithful. Corporations need to know if their intellectual property is safe, and people like the guy standing in front of his desk, need to know why somebody shot two .45 caliber slugs into his house in the middle of the night, just inches away from his sleeping son’s head.

When he came into the office, a wave of tension washed in with him. He stood nervously in front of Savage’s desk, his face worn and haggard from too many sleepless nights. His shoulders were slumped, as if he were carrying the weight of the world on his back. His gray-green eyes brimmed over with worry and concern as if they might just overflow with tears at any moment. He timidly offered his hand to Savage, who rose to greet the potential client, hand outstretched.

“John Moore,” he identified himself. “As I said on the phone, I got your number from the back page of the Alibi. I didn’t think you’d be open on a Sunday morning, though.”

“We never close,” Savage chuckled. You never know when a new client might come along and since he lived in the back room of office, he was always there. It looked like the ad on the back of the Albuquerque local free newspaper, “The Alibi”, had paid off.

“Please, have a seat, Mr. Moore,” Savage said.

“Please, call me John.

“The police said it was gang violence. While my wife and I were cleaning up the shattered glass in the street—they shot through the windows of our van at the house, taking out the front and rear windows. A little while later, a thug, not from the neighborhood, wearing an expensive leather coat, baggy black pants, long hair pulled back in a ponytail, came strolling down the street. He gave us a hard look as he went by. I could have sworn he was smiling, as if he was checking out the handiwork of his boys.”

“Do you agree with the police, John?” Savage asked.

“I’m not sure. I suppose I do. They know more than we do about this sort of thing. Our lives have been changed by this and all I really want is peace of mind that it won’t happen again.”

“Well, John, these are strange times we are living in. I’ve heard that most gangs don’t hit the same house twice, though,” Savage said, just missing the mark of being reassuring.

Savage could almost see the tears welling up in his eyes as he recalled the event.

“The police officer on the scene told me to contact him at this number.” He produced the business card of an officer Manuel Martinez with the case number, dated over a month ago, and a contact phone number. “But when I called a few days later to get a status on the case, he wasn’t there and they told me that it would take weeks to process the evidence anyway.”

“What kind of evidence did they turn up?”

“They found three .45 caliber shell casings in the street in front of my house and the two slugs they dug out of the exterior wall of our son Johnny’s bedroom. Just another foot higher and they would have hit him. He’s afraid to go to sleep. I’m just not sure that anything is being done to find these guys, Mr. Savage.”

“John, the cold, hard fact is, nobody died. With the increasing crime rate and the recent police budget cuts handed down by city hall, the cops in this town are very busy. Before you hire me, why not see how their investigation goes?

“And you can call me Drake.”

“That’s just it, Drake. It’s been five weeks. I’m afraid nothing is being done and I’m tired of waiting. We’re willing to pay your fee. Jennifer and I have some money saved up and the peace of mind will be worth whatever the cost.”

Savage could tell by the frayed hems on the sleeves of his faded yellow polo shirt, old jeans, and worn sneakers—you can really tell a lot about a man by his shoes–that he was not a rich man. Savage felt bad for the guy. His happy, safe, suburban world had been turned upside down in a matter of a few seconds and now he no longer knew which way was up. So he could continue sleeping at night, Savage would have to give him a break on his usual fee.

As if reading Savage’s mind, he asked, “What do you charge?”

“Well, I usually get five hundred a day, plus expenses, but in your case I’ll knock it down to one fifty, and I’ll eat the expenses, within reason.”

“I appreciate that, Drake. We aren’t rich.” He confessed.

“What do you do for a living, John? Is there anybody who might have a vendetta against you?”

“I’m an IT support tech at the base and Jennifer, my wife, is a database programming analyst. It’s not like we’ve been approached by any nefarious types to sell government information or anything like that.”

Savage could see that he wasn’t flush with cash and he liked him. He figured Moore to be the kind of guy that coached his son’s soccer team.

“Look John,” Savage said, “I think I might be able to help. I know a couple of guys on both sides of the law. I’ll ask around.

“Why don’t we give it a few days? Let me see what I can dig up. If it is a gang related thing, I don’t think anything else will happen. Like I said before, gangs, like lightning, don’t usually strike twice in the same place. The other thing is, gang related crime is practically impossible to track down. Too many frightened witnesses and nobody wants to come forward. Which reminds me, were there any witnesses?”

“My neighbor across the street said he heard something, but by the time he got out of bed and looked out the window, they were gone, only taillights fading up the street. He couldn’t even make out the model of the car, and when I got up, I couldn’t see over the next-door neighbor’s hedge, so we never even saw it. Almost everybody on our half of the block heard the gunshots but nobody saw anything,” he said, frustration filling his voice.

“Hmm, that’s not much to go on, but I’d like to interview your neighbors. They might remember something helpful. I know some techniques that are designed to jog a witness’ memory. Don’t worry, I won’t strong-arm anybody. I have a friend who’s a cop and he does all the strong-arming.” Savage chuckled.

Moore smiled for the first time since Savage had met him.

“I’m sure they all want to help. We are a very tight knit little community. We watch out for each other.”

“That’s good,” Savage said. “There’s not enough good will in the world anymore. Everybody seems to be just out for themselves. It’s sad.”

“Yes,” Moore said, shaking his head. “There just don’t seem to be good neighbors anymore–except on our block. I’m sure they’ll do anything they can.”

Savage had enough information to launch an investigation now.

“I’ve got your number, John,” Savage said. “I’ll be in touch.

Savage escorted Moore to the door. They sealed the deal with a firm handshake and he said goodbye. His step was definitely lighter than when he walked in. Savage liked making people feel better.

After Moore left, Savage went to the window to check out what kind of car he drove. You can also tell a lot about a man by the kind of car he drives. He peered through a slit in the blinds and saw him get into a six-year-old, forest green, Honda Passport with a red, white, and blue PLAYSOCCER bumper sticker on the back window. Savage was right. He wasn’t rich.

He sat down at his desk and began to formulate a plan, but since he always thought better behind a good, strong cup of java, it was time to visit Mabel’s for a bit of inspiration in the form of a double shot latte’. Back in the forties, a shamus worked best fueled by strong black coffee by day and whiskey by night. Savage didn’t have much of a taste for whiskey, but he did appreciate a good cup of joe. He developed a love for the coffee bean while he was stationed in Italy, defending America as a Special Forces grunt in the Air Force.

He’d seen some pretty hellish things in his day, usually being first on the scene to investigate the aftermath of terrorist bombings and the like, but his military life paved the way for his present life and it taught him how to survive. He really did hate the nightmares, though. Sometimes he’d wake up in a cold sweat at three in the morning because of the horrors he’d seen.

The shrinks at the VA threw drugs at him, but since he didn’t want to be a drug-addled zombie, he decided to take care of it himself. Sink or swim, and fortunately, he was a pretty fair swimmer. The nightmares weren’t quite as frequent now.

He locked up the office, went down the elevator, and strolled up the street to Mabel’s.

Mabel is a piece of work. She became a single mother after her husband was shot and killed during a robbery 20 years ago. She raised their four kids on her own, working two and three jobs. The family was poor but she raised them right. Her children went to school with clean clothes and clean faces. They knew the value of an education, too. All four went to college on scholarships. Her oldest, Martin, became a doctor. Next in line was Rosa, a lawyer. Then came Russell, now a successful architect. Finally there was Julia, an environmental scientist. Mabel’s kids pitched in and bought her the diner and the building that houses it. They pay the bills. Mabel wants for nothing but she earned it.

Sometimes Rosa hires him to do some work and Mabel’s kids appreciate the fact that Savage keeps an eye on her. He always eats for free.

Mabel was there, sitting at a table reading the Albuquerque Journal. He wondered if she ever slept. It might have something to do with the fact that she lived upstairs, but she seemed to always be there, watching over her café, even when he’s been there at eleven at night. If the doors were open, she was there until they closed.

She looked up from her paper, “Hi, Baby!” she called sweetly. She always calls him “Baby.” She is the only one that can get away with that. It’s an affectionate term she reserves for those who are special in her life, and he feels honored to be counted among them.

Savage smiled and nodded to Tony, behind the coffee bar.

Tony smiled back and Savage knew that in just minutes he’d be enjoying the best latte’ in the world.

Tony Antonio makes the best espresso you ever had. His real name, Ermenegildo di Baldassare Antonio, was a mighty big name for a little Italian guy. It was too hard to pronounce so when he came to America, he shortened it to Tony. He’s old school Italian, from a little town in southern Italy where his family has run a five-star restaurant for generations. His was a big family, and while all of his brothers and sisters became award-winning chefs, Tony concentrated on the perfect cup of espresso. Just the right mix of his own blend of coffee beans, not too strong, not too bitter, but with a bite. A taste that lingers in your mouth long after it’s passed your lips but isn’t overpowering. Sam Spade, Dashiell Hammett’s gumshoe, would have loved Tony’s espresso mixed with a shot of rye.

Savage’s usual table was in the back corner. He always sits with his back to the wall and a clear view of the door—more of that military commando training. After all, that’s how they got Wild Bill Hickok.

Tony brought over the steaming cup of latte’, prepared just the way he knew Savage liked it, a thin layer of foam covering the top. He stood there like a wine steward with a $1500 bottle of wine, awaiting the confirmation of what he already knew. Still, the steward needs the assurance of the connoisseur’s delight with the first sip, carefully reading the patron’s face and then delighting in the gleam of the eye that registers satisfaction.

“Perfect, as always,” Savage gave his assent. Another satisfied customer. Tony smiled, and then went back to the coffee bar.

A few seconds later, Mabel materialized to take his order. It was really just a formality—she already knew what he wanted. Even if she didn’t know the customer, she never used an order pad. She knew every single order in the place, who got what, and everything special about the order. She is one sharp lady.

“The usual?” she asked. Since it wasn’t noon yet, she knew he’d want breakfast.

“Yep,” Savage replied. His usual breakfast was three eggs up atop a pile of hashed browns with a side of bacon and wheat toast.

“Billy!” she yelled.

“Yes, dear?” came a voice from the kitchen.

“Drake’s usual!”

“Coming right up, Drake!” came Billy’s cheery reply.

“Thanks, Billy!” Savage called out.

Billy is Mabel’s cook. Formerly Chef Wilhelm Schach, of a high-class, four-star restaurant in L.A. named Schach Therapy. The restaurant was a huge success and he got caught in the tidal wave of excess that generally accompanies great success, namely cocaine. He seemed to have it under control, or so he thought.

Unfortunately, his business partner was in league with the mob and started skimming money from the take. Soon Wilhelm didn’t have the money to pay the bills and his restaurant failed. He went bankrupt. Suddenly without an income, he started selling drugs for the mafia. Just to get some money together to open up another place, he told himself, but most of his profits went up his nose.

He got caught in a DEA sting operation and was given a choice, a minimum of ten years hard time in Folsom or a reduced sentence for cooperating with the feds. Witness Protection allowed him to do his time in the Santa Fe penitentiary and moved him to Albuquerque when he got out.

He went into Mabel’s to get his first meal as a free man. She could tell he was troubled and inquired as to the nature of his dilemma. He took a chance and told her the whole story. She hired him immediately, as long as he stayed clean. 18 months in prison had cleaned him out physically, but he knew it would only take one episode and he’d be right back where he was when he got popped in the first place.

He’s been cooking for Mabel for five years. She pays him just double minimum wage and she lets him live rent-free in an apartment upstairs next to hers so she can keep an eye on him. She’s stingy with his paycheck because she doesn’t want him to be tempted to fall back into his old ways. The way she sees it, if he can’t afford it, he can’t buy it. Billy’s fine with that. As a recovering addict, he needs all the help he can get.

He has no desire to live life in the fast lane again anyway. He is content to work for Mabel, the greatest boss (and mother hen) in the world.

She gets the best cuisine money can buy. He is a magician in the kitchen and even though it’s American fare, it’s prepared by a four-star chef, making Mabel’s the Best American Restaurant in Albuquerque, as voted by the Alibi, the local free newspaper’s, readers poll, five years in a row.

And of course, Tony’s espresso has been voted as the “Best Cup of Joe” in town.

“You working?” she asked.

“Yeah,” he filled her in on John Moore’s dilemma. Ordinarily, he would never betray a client’s confidence, but there was no one to overhear the conversation and besides, it was Mabel. He had often solved cases just by talking them out with Mabel. Probably ought to give her a consulting fee, but she wouldn’t take it.

“Why would anybody do something like that? Destroy the sanctity of a family’s home?” she rolled her eyes.

“The police said it was a gang thing and you know, all bets are off when it comes to gang violence.

“I stopped trying to figure it out a long time ago, Mabel. The only thing that gets me through the night is the goodness that is left in the world. It still offsets the evil, thank God.”

“Well, I hope you help those poor folks find peace, Baby. If anyone can, it’s you.”

“Thanks, Mabel.”

She disappeared to get his breakfast.

As he sat sipping his latte’, he decided to call Detective Luke Swanson.

He had been stationed with Matt, Luke’s little brother, in Italy. Even though he had 20 years on the kid, there was something about him that Savage liked. He wasn’t like the others on Savage’s squad. There was something special about Matt. He had a truly unselfish attitude and genuine love of helping people in need. Usually after an op, Savage and his boys would go out and blow off some steam. Matt always joined in the fun, but stayed off to the side, watching their backs, preferring club soda to alcohol. Being the only sober one, he’d step in if there was trouble. He was always the designated driver, too. A valuable member of the team.

He excelled in explosives training at the academy and he became the squad explosive ordinance disposal, or EOD, expert.

All Matt really wanted was to come back to Albuquerque when his hitch was up and be a good cop like his big brother. Unfortunately, a terrorist’s bomb cut that dream short.

An Italian diplomat’s daughter had been kidnapped. Since it was such a high-profile op, Savage was ordered to stay behind and coordinate.

The team got the word that she was sitting on the steps of the American Embassy, wired with enough C-4 to blow up a city block. Matt, being the EOD expert, was assigned to disable the bomb.

He was equipped with a helmet camera and headset so Savage could see everything that Matt saw. The girl was still wearing her school uniform. The navy blue jacket was mostly obscured by the vest of explosives. Terror flashed in the girl’s dark eyes. He could almost smell the fear through the monitor.

“Parlate inglese?” Matt asked in a soothing voice.

The poor girl was trembling with fear.

“A little,” she whispered, afraid she might detonate the bomb.

“Good. Now I’m just gonna get this thing off you and then you can go home and see your Madre e Padre, okay?”

Some of the fear faded from her eyes as she thought of her parents. She nodded slowly.

“There’s nothing to be afraid of. I’ve done this a thousand times,” Matt said.

The confidence in his voice made her relax a little more.

“Okay, Matt,” Savage said into his microphone. “So far, textbook. How are you feeling?”

“Everything’s fine, Chief.”

“Boys, get the blast shield set up and get everybody out of that building.”

The rest of the team went to work and set up the blast shield. They got all the civilians out and everyone withdrew to a safe distance.

Matt kept his eyes on the girl. Her face was twisted with fear.

“What’s your name?” Matt asked, already knowing the answer. It was in the briefing, but it made the girl think of something other than the situation.

“Giovanna. It means God is gracious.”

“He certainly is,” Matt agreed.

“Here we go. Now hold very still, Giovanna, and we’ll see what we can do about this,” he worked quickly and confidently.

Matt managed to disable most of the C-4, tossing it into the explosion-proof bin next to the blast shield.

“Chief, you gettin’ all this?” Matt said into his headset. “This is a strange one. Never seen anything wired quite like this. They didn’t do a very good job. Just look at this wiring. Amateurs, y’know?”

“Matt, if you don’t think you can do it, leave it alone. The majority of the bomb has been disabled. We can bring in another expert. She’s relatively safe now,” Savage cautioned.

“Aw shucks, Chief, and leave this pretty thing wired to explode? There ain’t nothing to it. Looks like I just gotta cut this—“

Savage was deafened by the roar of the explosion for a split second until Matt’s headset and camera were incinerated by the blast. His monitor went blank.

 

END OF CHAPTER ONE

 

To Be Continued…

Aaaaand We’re Back!

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Hello.

So glad you could join us.

It’s been awhile since last we spoke, and a lot of things have changed, but we’re nothing if not tenacious (even if it might take a couple of years or 5), and one of those changes is that I have retired. That’s right, on Friday, April 13th (I know, right, Friday the 13th?) I hung up my spurs and screwdrivers, and I’m done riding the dusty trails of New Mexico and El Paso, Texas in search of a computer to fix or a printer to wrangle.

For the first time in just about 50 years, I can completely focus on all things writerly, with no other agenda, except day-to-day life.

I am so looking forward to being able to have the time to sit here:

TheWriter

or here, when I’m feeling more formal:

WritingSpace

and just write, all day long, if I wish.

I was chatting with an old friend about being a professional writer (if you look real close at the papers on the picture above, you’ll see that the top one is a check for a whole forty dollars that I got from selling my comics over the past year or so. Of course half of that, after expenses, goes to my artist collaborators, Nathan and Paul, so I’m not “making bank” or anything), and my friend said, “Now all you gotta worry about is writer’s block.”

To which I replied, “No, I don’t think that’ll be a problem. I have enough editing of my novel that isn’t finished, and a whole mess of comic scripts that need to be written, based on that novel, so subject matter won’t be an issue.

“I’ve also got almost 50 years worth of ideas that have been rattling around in my head for other books, stories, and comics to draw from as well, so the imagination well won’t run dry anytime soon.”

The amazing thing is that I can finally do something about it, without any other distractions to prevent me from getting the ideas out my head and into a computer, and hopefully, into your head, my friends, should you choose to join me!

Yup, boredom and writer’s block shouldn’t be a thing…

So, fasten your seat belts, keep your hands and arms inside the compartment, and get ready to BLAST OFF!

Here we go…

Thanks for coming along,

Your pal,

Chuck

Hi Max!

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Hello All,

As you can tell from facebook posts by my beloved Dominique Jones and Katie Larntz Johnson, today marks the 23rd anniversary of the passing of our first born son, Thomas Charles Maxfield Larntz.

 

Max was dealt a pretty tough hand at birth, coming into the world with only half a heart, suffering from Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypoplastic_left_heart_syndrome) but he was a fighter even at that young age and he actually outgrew the stent in his heart, which was the first part of a three part process, essentially giving him a turtle heart. I used to say that “my son may not ever be Jim Thorpe, All-American, but that doesn’t mean he can’t be Albert Einstein.”

 

Alas, it was not to be. Max was too healthy and outgrew the stent a month sooner than his second operation. The stent was leaking blood into his heart until his heart could no longer pump, and he left us. 23 years ago, this operation was experimental and only had a 10 to 30 per cent success rate and that has grown to a 70 per cent success rate today. I can only hope the docs at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia learned something from our loss and I pray that 70 per cent someday grows to 100.

 

After Max passed we took his ashes up to Sandia Crest, along with hundreds of flower tops that we tossed in the air. The mountain winds took his ashes and the flower tops and spread them across the mountain top (and many of them are still flowering today).

 

Today, Dominique, Katie, the twins, and I went up to visit Max..

 

Here are some pictures that we took. I hope you enjoy them, and thanks for listening.

 

Be Well,

 

Your Pal,

 

Chuck

 

That third picture is a ribbon we tied around the branch 23 years ago. It is now part of the tree, just like Max…

20130527_14113320130527_14081920130527_140744

Savage the Comic, Issue #1: Goodbyes (almost…)

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Hello friends,
Well, this marks a momentous occasion. The cover, inside cover, back cover, and inside back cover to Savage Investigations the Comic, Issue #1: “Goodbyes” is ready for print. Dominique Jones and I, well, her mainly, finished it tonight. And here they are, coming soon to a comic shop (assuming you live in Albuquerque) near you–at least as soon as we figure out how we’re gonna get it printed. Here they are. Lemme know what you think, please. Written by me and Nathan Hendricksen did the artwork.

CoverIssue1Goodbyes

Cover Issue1: Goodbyes

InsideCoverGoodbyes 
Inside Cover: Goodbyes

BackInsideCoverGoodbyes  
Back Inside Cover: Goodbyes

BackCoverGoodbyes
Back Cover: Goodbyes

 

 

 

Living on Borrowed Time…

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This is my facebook post commemorating one year of survival after the BIG EVENT…

 

Hello facebookians,

Today marks my one year anniversary being smoke free. I never thought I’d see this day, let alone be kinda happy about it. True, I still want a cigarette, but I have to admit the craving has lessened somewhat (okay, a LOT!), but I still want a smoke and I’ve been told that I probably will for the rest of my days…

Speaking of which, tomorrow morning at 3 a.m. marks the first year of what I have come to think of as my living on borrowed time, since if I wouldn’t have taken  it seriously, I would not be around to type this.

You can call it a new lease on life or any number of other monikers that can be attributed to this phenomenon, but I call it my “It’s Better than Being Dead” philosophy. The discomfort I still feel from not having a smoke? It’s better than being dead! The fact that I seem to have developed this nasal twang to my once deep and booming voice because I used to smoke KOOLs (as we used to say in my troubled youth growing up in Detroit, “Smoke KOOL be cool, Jack!”), the menthol would clear up my sinuses and allow me to breathe better—ironic, ain’t it? Even my Ear, Nose and Throat doc agrees. Come to find out I have a badly deviated septum and it can be fixed with surgery, but hey, it’s better than—well, you get the idea. After all, those of you that have been paying attention (and Boy Howdy! I THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT!)  know that’s how I have survived, and let’s face it, THRIVED, since the big event a year ago.

Eating better? Oh, hell yeah! I’ve even been exercising! A lot! Averaging 4 times a week, and some weeks even more! There’s something I never thought I would ever say, but yes, it’s true. I feel healthier living on borrowed time than I have in my entire existence on this mortal coil. My latest tactic is to find a “good reason” not to go to the gym. I do a reality check and if I can’t find a good reason not to go, I have to go. Like tonight f’rinstance, I tried like heck to think of a good enough reason not to go, but darned if I could find one, so I went. Truth to tell, I’m glad, too. THERE’s something I never thought I’d say, either!

So, a few months ago my doctor told me that I was doing so well that he wants to put my picture in a frame at the end of the hallway at the rehab facility (that I call my gym) as an example for all to see what a model patient looks like. Now he hasn’t really done that, nor do I expect him to, but gosh darn it, it sure makes me feel good, and that’s one of the things that keeps me smoke free and going to the gym, eating right, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera (to quote Yul Brynner in “The King and I”)…

Here we are one year later. I’m still standing (to quote Sir Elton John) and doing pretty darn well.

Let’s get maudlin, shall we? Awhile back, my beloved K8T posted something in facebook about how if her Dad could quit smoking, so could anybody! I gotta tellya, that made all weepy (and still does), knowing that my little girl is using me as an example for her friends. I LOVE being a good example. That’s like, the coolest thing about being a parent, right?

So there you go, my one year anniversary, living on borrowed time. It’s been tough, but hey, IT’S BETTER THAN BEING DEAD!

Thanks for caring, facebookians. I really do appreciate it.

Your Pal,

Chuck

A Heart Attack? Really?

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Tuesday, February 28th, I woke with an interesting feeling.

At 3 am, I got up to use the facilities and I noticed that it felt like I had a pinched nerve in the center of my back, and my left arm felt like it was asleep. We have a sleep number bed and sometimes my arm goes to sleep in the middle of the night.  I tried rotating my shoulder, thinking I had slept wrong, maybe twisted in my sleep or something, and the circulation to my arm just didn’t feel right. Besides the pain in my chest and back felt like my ribs were poking into my chest. Still, could be a pinched nerve, pulled ligament, or something like that. Might even be heartburn. Since the tingly arm was a component, I started to think about a stroke so I went to the interwebs to research stroke symptoms. Smiled in the mirror, no droopy side of my face. Held out my arms, no falling arm. Did have the tingling left arm but it might still have been asleep. I was also able to recite a complex phrase without slurring my words. 3 out of 4, no sale.  This had happened once before, about six months ago and I got up, took a couple of TUMS and went back to bed and never gave it a second thought. So, I ate a couple of TUMS and the pain abated enough to let me go back to bed until 6 am,  when I woke up again with the same pain. I was still thinking nerve pinch and decided to get up and get ready for work.

When I was just finishing up in the shower, I felt pretty light headed and decided that now would be a good time to lay on the floor so I did. Lay there for a few minutes, felt a little better and got up, finished toweling off and got dressed. Damn pain would not leave me alone and it seemed to be getting worse so I came out to the living room and told Dominique that I think she needed to drive me to the ER because I may be having a heart attack. She wanted to call 911 but I said I’d be fine and who wants to pay $800 for a fancy cab ride? She got dressed and we went out to get in her car.

Once I was in the passenger seat, it felt like my heart was going to erupt from my chest, ALIEN style, and I said, “Y’know, the $800 cab ride looks pretty good to me right now,” and I went back into the house to try to get comfortable to wait.

Dominique called 911.

Tried everything, lying on the floor with my feet up on the seat of the couch, no joy. Feet on the floor, no joy; knees bent, same result. Tried standing, sitting, leaning, nothing brought any relief. I started to get scared. Dominique sat on the couch and held my hand till the ambulance came and then things got kind of crazy.

Suddenly, my house was teeming with emergency healthcare professionals whose mission was to save my life. And save it they did.

First thing was oxygen through a cannula. Almost immediate relief. Then came two baby aspirin. More relief.

The pain scale was brought into play: 0 to 10, 10 being the most excruciating pain in your life, where was I at? Had to say, at the worst, 8.5—almost broken bone kind of pain but scarier because this is your heart you’re talking about, and nothing is more important than your heart. My vitals were stable and the pain almost non-existent so I was now at a .5, which the ambulance crew thought was hilarious—nobody ever broke it down to .5s before. Then when James, one of the firefighters, was setting me up an IV, he missed the vein. To which I said, “James, how could you miss my vein? It’s a junkie’s wet dream!”, which it is. I have great veins! They hadn’t heard that one before, either and hilarity again ensued. They figured that since my vitals were good there was no rush, so we leisurely drove through the early morning traffic to the VA Hospital Emergency Room.

Once we arrived, I was immediately whisked to a holding room and I bade goodbye to my saviors, Jason and—regretfully, I didn’t catch his partners name.

Kay, my new nurse, gave me a half an inch of nitroglycerine from a tube and popped a plastic patch over it. The relief was almost immediate, since the pain had started to come back again. A few minutes later a cardiology team came in and decided that I was suffering from a blockage of one of the major arteries and then proceeded to lay out the plan.

After a few minutes more I was whisked to the Cath Lab, wherein a balloon catheter would be inserted in my femoral artery and snaked up into my heart, blown up to remove the blockage (95% as it turned out, The Widowmaker, if not resolved, I was ominously told later) and a stent would be inserted to hold the artery open so blood could flow.

They popped a hole in my right femoral artery, in the crease between my right leg and my side, gave me drugs so I think I pretty much slept through the whole thing, except for when I looked up at the monitor and saw this explosion of dye filled blood once the stent was in place. I am going to try to get that visual texted to my phone so I can look at it whenever I want a cigarette, which I have since ceased. I used to say that the main reason I didn’t quit is because I didn’t want to be wanting a cigarette for the rest of my life, but now it seems that the rest of my life actually depends on me wanting a cigarette for the rest of my life, so I’m going to deal with it. I’m hoping the feeling will pass, but hey, if it doesn’t, it will still be better than being dead, right? It seems as if that’s where the stakes are now: craving or death. No contest, eh?

Speaking of which, today is my fourth day totally smoke free. Still fighting the craving…

After the angioplasty at the Cath Lab, they took me upstairs to CCU where I exhibited all the best possible results. All my vitals were normal to the point being downright boring, almost as if nothing had even happened. All of my caretakers were amazed. No pain, perfect vitals (98.6 temp!), everything more normal than it should be, especially considering what I had just put my old, creaky body through.

Thank God for small mercies.

And so I do.

Oh, there was one possible speed bump. On Wednesday morning they did an Echo Cardiogram and we found out that where everyone else has a tricuspid valve at the base of the aorta, I have a bicuspid valve and it seemed to be a bit enlarged. So they decided that I needed a CT scan to see what was up with that bicuspid thing. Side note: Abraham Lincoln had the same thing, which somehow made him so tall, or so they said. Anyway, went down for the CT scan at midnight Wednesday night, the docs read the results Thursday morning and said the equivalent of, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” but we’re going to keep an eye on the condition. Good thing too, because it would have meant open heart surgery and I would not be sitting here in the comfort of my living room sharing with you right now.

Again, thank God for small mercies (and BIG ones, too!)…

Goodbyes: Issue 1, and Aftermath: Issue 2: 20111029

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SAVAGE INVESTIGATIONS

Issue # 1

Goodbyes

STORY BY

CHUCK LARNTZ

email: chuck@larntz.com

ART BY

NATHAN HENDRICKSEN

Copyright © 2005 and 2008

SPLASH PAGE? IF SO, SHOW THE PARTYING GROUP OF MEN IN MID-PARTY, EATING, DRINKING, POINTING, LAUGHING, AND JOKING. GENERALLY MAKING MERRY. WE CAN TALK ABOUT THE LAYOUT OF THE SPLASH PAGE.

PAGE 1 (five panels, 1st across the top of page and the other four, two across)

PANEL 1 (across the top of the page so you get a good shot of the setting)

POV LOOKING AT SAVAGE’S 7 MAN TEAM, ALL SEATED AROUND A LARGE EIGHT FOOT ROUND TABLE IN A RESTAURANT. THERE ARE DISHES IN FRONT OF THEM, AS THEY HAVE JUST FINISHED A GOOD MEAL. THEY ARE THE ONLY PATRONS. THEIR HAIR IS CUT MILITARY SHORT. THEY WEAR NO OVERTLY AMERICAN CLOTHING, AND THEY ALL ARE OF MIXED ETHNICITIES. SAVAGE IS STANDING, CENTER OF PANEL, ADDRESSING THE GROUP, WHOSE BACKS ARE TO US, AND MATT IS FACING US TO SAVAGE’S LEFT, THE POSITION OF HONOR.

SAVAGE: 

Matt, we’ve been through a lot together in the past five years.

PANEL 2

POV CLOSER UPPER BODY SHOT OF SAVAGE AS HE CONTINUES TO SPEAK.

SAVAGE:

Is there anything I can do or say to make you sign up for another hitch?

PANEL 3

POV SAVAGE’S VIEWPOINT, LOOKING AT HEAD AND SHOULDER SHOT OF MATT. HE IS SMILING AS IF HE CAN’T BELIEVE THEY ARE GOING THERE YET AGAIN…

MATT:

Afraid not, Chief. I just want to go back to Albuquerque and be a good cop, like my brother.

PANEL 4

POV OVER MATT’S SHOULDER AT THE MEN GATHERED AROUND THE TABLE.

MATT:

I’ve only got a week to go and then I’m back home on the APD Bomb Squad.

PANEL 5

POV PROFILE TO SHOULDER OF MATT, WHO HAS TURNED TO LOOK AT SAVAGE (ALSO IN PROFILE ON OTHER SIDE OF PANEL). BOTH MEN ARE SMILING GOOD NATUREDLY.

MATT:

I can’t believe you’re still asking me. You know they’re holding a spot for me.

SAVAGE:

Come on Matt, you know I have to keep asking. You’re just too good to let go lightly.

PAGE 2 (6 panels, standard 6 panel page)

PANEL 1

POV OPPOSITE OF PREVIOUS PANEL WITH MATT ON RIGHT AND SAVAGE ON LEFT.

SAVAGE:

It’s just that, well, we’ve kinda gotten used to you, and what if your replacement turns out to be a jerk?

MATT:

What can I say, Chief? I know you’ll straighten him out.

PANEL 2

POV CLOSER UPPER BODY SHOT OF SAVAGE. HE’S SHRUGGING HIS SHOULDERS, ARMS OUT TO THE SIDE, PALMS UP.

SAVAGE:

I keep hoping you’ll change your mind. Albuquerque P.D. had better know how lucky they are to get you.

PANEL 3

POV WIDE ANGLE SHOT OF ENTIRE GROUP AROUND THE TABLE, SAVAGE ON LEFT AND THE OTHERS TO HIS RIGHT. SAVAGE IS HOLDING HIS GLASS HIGH, AS IS THE REST OF THE GROUP.

SAVAGE:

So, as much as it pains me to say it, here’s hoping you have a fulfilling career helping the folks back home.

PANEL 4

POV SHOT OF WHOLE TABLE, GLASSES RAISED.

REST OF TEAM:

HEAR, HEAR! (in unison—one sentence, bold type, as if shouted, several tails from speech bubble on right side of panel)

PANEL 5

POV FULL ROOM SHOT: TABLE ON LEFT SIDE OF PANEL AND THE RESTAURANT DOOR OPEN ON RIGHT.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 6

POV HALF CLOSER SHOT OF OPEN DOOR AS LIEUTENANT WALKING IN WITH MAJOR CLOSE BEHIND. BOTH WEARING SHORT SLEEVE LIGHT BLUE SHIRTS WITH BLUE TROUSERS, UNIFORM OF THE DAY, AND THEY ARE REMOVING THEIR GARRISON CAPS.

PAGE 3 (5 panels)

PANEL 1

POV ¾ SIDE SHOT OF SAVAGE AND MAJOR SPEAKING TO ONE ANOTHER. MAJOR IS VERY CLOSE TO SAVAGE’S EAR AND LT. STANDING A FEW PACES BACK ALMOST OUT OF FRAME.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 2

 POV MAJOR  WALKING TOWARDS THE DOOR, LT HOLDING THE DOOR OPEN FOR MAJOR. SAVAGE STILL STANDING, NOW FACING FRANCO, RESTAURANT OWNER, WHO IS COMING IN FROM THE KITCHEN AT THE LEFT SIDE OF FRAME. HE HAS AN APRON TIED IN HALF AROUND HIS WAIST AND IS HOLDING A TOWEL. HE WEARS BLACK PANTS AND A WHITE SHIRT, SLEEVES ROLLED UP TO THE FOREARMS. HE’S A LITTLE PUDGY AND HAS A BIG BLACK MUSTACHE AND UNKEMPT CURLY BLACK HAIR.

SAVAGE:

Gonna have to pack it in, boys. Franco, my friend, I’m afraid we have to leave. We’ve got work to do.

FRANCO:

Is okay, Drake. Just be careful.

PANEL 3 (across whole page for the wide shot)

POV OUTSIDE OF FRANCO’S. NIGHTTIME STREET SCENE WITH WINDOWS AND WINDOWBOXES WITH FLOWERS AND CURB AND MAYBE A BICYCLE CHAINED TO A LIGHT POLE—THE TEAM WALKING UP TO AN UNMARKED MILITARY SWAT TYPE BREAD TRUCK VAN. REAR DOOR IS OPEN AND YOU CAN SEE ONE FOOT STICKING OUT THE DOOR AS A MEMBER OF THE TEAM IS CLIMBING IN.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 4

POV FROM CENTER OF REAR DOORS OF VAN. MEN LINED UP ALONG SEATS ON EACH SIDE OF VAN AND SAVAGE FACING THEM SEATED BEHIND THE DRIVER. SAVAGE IS REMOVING AN 8 X 10 PHOTO FROM THE FOLDER HE IS HOLDING  (PHOTO IS OF GIRL WEARING C4 VEST—CAN ONLY SEE THE TOP OF PHOTO AND IT’S SIDEWAYS SINCE HE’S PULLING IT OUT OF THE FOLDER—NO NEED FOR DETAIL…).

SAVAGE:

Okay, here’s what we’ve got so far, Armando Francelli’s daughter was kidnapped from her private school in Rome early this afternoon.

PANEL 5

POV WAIST HIGH SHOT OF SAVAGE IN SAME POSITION AS BEFORE AS CAMERA IS ZOOMING IN. HANDS PHOTO TO MAN ON HIS RIGHT.

SAVAGE:

As you know, Francelli is the Italian Minister of Finance, so all eyes are going to be on this one. By the numbers, gentlemen.

PAGE 4 (6 panels)

PANEL 1

POV FINAL ZOOM OF SAVAGE’S HEAD AND SHOULDERS AS HE CONTINUES.

SAVAGE:

She’s currently standing in front of the entrance gate of the American Embassy in Naples. The gate guard took this picture.

PANEL 2

SAME AS PAGE 3, PANEL 5. FIRST GUY IS HOLDING THE PHOTO.

FIRST GUY:

She’s wearing a vest wired with enough C-4 to blow up four city blocks.

SAVAGE:

That’s right, Mickey, and then some.

PANEL 3

POV SHOT OF SAVAGE FROM REAR CORNER OF VAN. FIRST GUY IS PASSING PHOTO TO SECOND GUY TO HIS RIGHT.

SAVAGE:

Nobody saw anything. She just showed up. Twenty minutes ago, a van pulled up outside the embassy, pushed her out, and drove off.

PANEL 4

POV WAIST HIGH SHOT OF SAVAGE.

SAVAGE:

Since the grounds of the embassy extend to the curb, she’s technically on American soil. It’s our job.

PANEL 5

POV SIDE SHOT OF SAVAGE FROM OTHER REAR CORNER OF VAN. SECOND GUY HOLDING THE PHOTO.

SAVAGE:

The Carabinieri have cordoned off a ten-block area surrounding the embassy. Mostly office buildings and warehouses so there’s not much traffic this time of night.

PANEL 6

POV 3/4 shot of Savage from back of the van. SECOND GUY PASSING PHOTO TO MATT.

SAVAGE:

You’re gonna be on your own, boys. They want me back at the base command post but I’ll be with you every step of the way.

PAGE 5 (6 panels)

PANEL 1

POV PROFILE HALF BODY SHOT OF SAVAGE.

SAVAGE:

Fortunately, nobody’s called CNN yet, but it’s only a matter of time.

PANEL 2

POV SIDE SHOT OF SAVAGE, MATT IN FOREGROUND. MATT IS HOLDING PHOTO AND LOOKING AT IT.

SAVAGE:

Matt, you will disable the bomb.

MATT:

Chief, how old is this girl?

SAVAGE: 

She’s 15, why?

MATT:

And she was kidnapped how long ago?

PANEL 3

POV OPPOSITE SHOT OF PANEL 2, SAVAGE AND MATT REVERSED POSITIONS AND OTHER SIDE OF THEIR HEADS.

SAVAGE:

Around 3:30 this afternoon. What are you getting at?

MATT:

I want to do this without the bomb suit.

PANEL 4

POV HEAD SHOT OF SAVAGE, STERN LOOK ON HIS FACE.

SAVAGE:

Didn’t I just say, ‘by the numbers’? That goes against every regulation on the books. Why?

PANEL 5

POV HEAD SHOT OF MATT AS HE EXPLAINS.

MATT:

Because she’s been a hostage for what, 10 hours, now?

SAVAGE:

That’s about right.

MATT:

She’s tired and scared. Probably disoriented.

PANEL 6

POV PULL BACK TO HALF BODY SHOT OF MATT, HE’S HOLDING PHOTO IN ONE HAND AS HE SPEAKS.

MATT:

The bomb suit is a scary thing.

PAGE 6 (6 panels)

PANEL 1

POV DRAW CAMERA BACK ON MATT TO ¾ VIEW.

MATT:

That much C-4 is going to be heavy so she’s gonna be unstable on her feet and any unnecessary movement could set it off. That may be why they just pushed her out of the van and left.

PANEL 2

POV SIDE SHOT OF MATT AND SAVAGE.

SAVAGE:

Go on.

MATT:

I’m afraid the suit would scare the bejesus out of her. MAYBE SHOW A THOUGHT BUBBLE FROM MATT OF THE BOMB SUIT. I HAVE PICS IF YOU WANT THEM.

PANEL 3

POV OVER SAVAGE’S SHOULDER FACING MATT.

MATT:

This is a delicate op and needs a personal touch. I want her to be able to look in my eyes and I want to see hers. I don’t want her to see her own distorted reflection in the face mask of the suit.

PANEL 4

POV SIDE SHOT OF MATT FACING SAVAGE.

MATT:

She’s a scared little girl and all it will take is just one false move and that much C-4 is gonna blow the bomb suit to bits anyway, and everything else within a two block radius.

PANEL 5

POV MATT FROM OVER SAVAGE’S SHOULDER.

SAVAGE:

I have to admit you’re right, but you are at least going to wear body armor, helmet cam, and headset. I want to be in constant contact.

MATT (SMILING):

Yes, sir.

PANEL 6

POV HEAD SHOT OF SAVAGE, CONCERNED LOOK ON HIS FACE.

SAVAGE (thought bubble):

Matt’s right, the bomb suit is clumsy and wouldn’t afford much protection if the thing went off. Just the same, if this goes wrong…

PAGE 7 (3 panels)

SPLIT PAGE IN HALF AND TOP TWO QUARTERS 1 AND 2 STARKLY LIT HARD BLACK AND WHITE CONTRAST THROUGHOUT THESE TWO SHOTS. BOTTOM HALF PAGE IS PANEL 3, FULLY DETAILED CLOSEUP OF GIOVANNA’S FACE.

PANEL 1

POV LONG DISTANCE (ABOUT A BLOCK) OF THE FRONT OF THE U.S. CONSOLATE IN NAPLES. THERE IS A SILHOUETTE OF A HUNCHED OVER FIGURE STANDING IN FRONT OF THE MAIN ENTRANCE GATE, BATHED IN THE HARSH GLARE OF SPOTLIGHTS SHINING DOWN FROM THE ROOF AND MOBILE LIGHTING UNITS SET UP TO ILLUMINATE THE AREA.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 2

POV SAME ANGLE BUT ZOOMED IN TO REVEAL FULL BODY SHOT OF TALL, GANGLY GIRL SLIGHTLY STOOPED OVER FROM THE WEIGHT OF THE VEST COVERED WITH ½ POUND BRICKS OF C-4 IN POCKETS SEWN INTO THE VEST WITH WIRES SPROUTINGFROM EACH BRICK. SHE’S WEARING A SCHOOL UNIFORM OF A PLAID, KNEE-LENGTH SKIRT AND WHITE BLOUSE UNDER THE VEST. ONE OF HER SLEEVES IS TORN AND HER WHITE KNEE SOCKS ARE TORN AND DIRTY. HER ONCE SHINY BLACK SHOES ARE SCUFFED. SHE IS TALL FOR HER AGE AND THAT’S ANOTHER REASON FOR THE STOOPED POSTURE, SHE HASN’T YET GROWN INTO HER HEIGHT. IN TIME, SHE WILL GROW INTO A STAUESQUE BEAUTY BUT FOR NOW SHE HUNCHES OVER TO BE THE SAME HEIGHT AS HER PEERS. SHE STANDS ALONE IN THE HARSH WHITE LIGHT OF THE LIGHTING UNITS.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 3 (bottom half of page)

POV SAME ANGLE AS PREVIOUS TWO SHOTS BUT A CLOSE UP OF GIOVANNA FRANCELLI’S TERRIFIED, TEAR STAINED FACE. SHE IS BEAUTIFUL WITH HUGE BROWN EYES AND LONG, STRAIGHT BROWN HAIR, HIGH CHEEKBONES AND ALMOST TOO LONG OVAL FACE. THERE IS A BRIUSE OVER HER LEFT EYE AND A TRICKLE OF BLOOD RUNNING FROM IT, WHERE ONE OF HER CAPTORS STRUCK HER.

Dramatic, ain’t it?

PAGE 8 (4 panels- panel 1 across top of page)

PANEL 1

POV DISTANCE SHOT OF THE VAN ROLLING THROUGH THE ITALIAN COUNTRYSIDE, HEADLIGHTS CUTTING THE GLOOM OF NIGHT.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 2

FRONT SHOT OF VAN AT THE ENTRANCE GATE OF THE BASE

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 3

REAR SHOT OF VAN, NOW ON BASE DRIVING UP TO COMMAND POST.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 4 (across bottom of page)

POV DISTANCE SHOT OF THE TEAM SPLITTING UP. TEAM CLIMBING INTO TWO MILITARY TRANSPORTS PARKED TO THE RIGHT OF THE STAIRS LEADING TO COMMAND POST, AND SAVAGE WALKING UP STAIRS OF COMMAND POST.

PAGE 9 (4 panels)

PANEL 1 (across top of page)

LONG SHOT OF TWO TRANSPORTS GOING OPPOSITE DIRECTION OF VAN IN PAGE 8, PANEL 1 SO READER THINKS THE TEAM IS GOING TO THE SITE.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 2

AERIAL SHOT (MAYBE FROM ROOFTOP) OF TRANSPORTS GOING THROUGH NAPLES. STREETS ARE DESERTED. GREEN AND WHITE POLICIA CARS AT EVERY CORNER—THE CORDONED LINE.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 3

ANT’S EYE VIEW OF THE TWO TRANSPORTS ARRIVING ON SCENE.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 4 (across bottom of page)

WIDE SHOT OF TRANSPORTS ON LEFT, GUARD GATE ON RIGHT, EMBASSY IN BACKGROUND AND GIOVANNA IN THE CENTER OF FRAME.

VOICE FROM TRANSPORT:

We’re here, Chief.

SAVAGE: (in static electronic sound bubble)

All right, boys, get everything set up.

PAGE 10 (8 panels)

PANEL 1

POV SIDE VIEW SHOT OF MATT, WALKING UP TO GIOVANNA IN FULL BATTLE DRESS WITH A HELMET CAM AND POLYCARBONATE FACE SHIELD. HE IS HOLDING A BOTTLE OF BOTTLED WATER ABOUT TO OFFER HER A DRINK AND HAS A BIG SMILE ON HIS FACE.

MATT: (thought bubble)

I’d like to get my hands on the punk that hit her.

PANEL 2

POV MATT, FROM WAIST UP, GIOVANNA’S POV AS HE’S RAISING THE BOTTLE OF WATER. HE IS SMILING BROADLY, AND YOU CAN SEE HIS FACE THROUGH THE FACE SHIELD, EYES WIDE AND NON-THREATENING.

MATT:

Parlate’ inglese?

GIOVANNA:

A little.

MATT:

Heck, I’ll bet you speak better than me. Let’s get that thing off of you, okay?

GIOVANNA:

Yes, grazie.

PANEL 3

POV MATT FROM GIOVANNA’S POV.

MATT:

Would you like a drink?

PANEL 4

POV GIOVANNA FROM MATT’S POV.

GIOVANNA:

Thank you.

PANEL 5

POV HALF BODYSHOT OF MATT. MATT IS STILL SMILING AND TWISTING THE CAP OFF THE BOTTLE OF WATER.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 6

POV MATT RAISES THE BOTTLE TO HER LIPS.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 7

MATT SETS THE BOTTLE OF WATER DOWN ON THE GROUND.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 8

POV SIDE ½ BODY SHOT OF MATT AND GIOVANNA. MATT IS REACHING FOR GIOVANNA’S HANDS.

NO DIALOGUE

PAGE 11 (3 panels)

PANEL 1

POV MATT HAS BOTH OF HER HANDS IN HIS.

MATT:

What is your name?

GIOVANNA:

Giovanna. It means God is gracious.

PANEL 2

POV ¾ VIEW OF MATT AND GIOVANNA. MATT IS STILL HOLDING HER HANDS.

MATT:

Yes, Giovanna, He is.

PANEL 3 (bottom half of page)

POV SHOT FROM BEHIND AND TO THE RIGHT OF SAVAGE AS HE SITS AT THE COMMAND CONTROL CONSOLE. A LARGE 21 INCH MONITOR IN THE CENTER, FLANKED BY TWO 17 INCH MONITORS. THERE IS A SLIDER SWITCH ON A CONSOLE FOR EACH MONITOR AND A FEW MORE PUSHBUTTONS AND SWITCHES. THE 17 INCH MONITOR SCREENS SHOW TWO DIFFERENT VIEWS OF MATT AND GIOVANNA HOLDING HANDS. THE RIGHT ONE IS A CLOSER VIEW. ITS SLIDER SWITCH IS TOWARD THE MID RANGE WHILE TO OTHER SLIDER IS ALL THE WAY DOWN AND THE PICTURE IS SMALLER. THERE IS A PIECE OF TAPE ACROSS THE TOP OF EACH THAT SAYS “ROOF EAST” AND “ROOF WEST” RESPECTIVELY. THE BIG MONITOR IS MATT’S HELMET CAM AND IT SHOWS GIOVANNA’S FACE IN ADDITION TO TWO JAGGED LINE READOUTS RUNNING ACROSS THE BOTTOM OF THE SCREEN, ONE WITH A HEART SHAPED SYMBOL AND THE OTHER A SYMBOL OF A PERSON SPEAKING WITH VOICE LINES COMING OUT OF THE MOUTH. THERE IS ALSO A KEYBOARD AND MOUSE IN THE CENTER OF THE DESK. HE’S WEARING A FUTURISTIC HEADSET WITH THE BOOM ON THE RIGHT SIDE.

SAVAGE:

Boys, get everybody out of that building, and get the blast screen set up around Matt and the girl.

PAGE 12 (5 panels)

PANEL 1 (across top of page)

POV STREET SCENE WITH THE OTHER TEAM MEMBERS LEADING A FEW PEOPLE OUT THE GATES TO SAFETY ON THE LEFT SIDE AND TWO OTHER TEAM MEMBERS FINISHING SETTING UP THE BLAST SCREEN, A 10 FOOT HIGH BY SIX FOOT WIDE CLEAR POLYCARBONITE OCTAGON WITH STEEL RODS REINFORCING THE SIDES AND ALONG THE GROUND AND OUT IN A 20 FOOT SPOKE PATTERN TO STABILIZE IT. MATT AND GIOVANNA ARE IN THE CENTER, STILL HOLDING HANDS. NEXT TO THE BLAST SCREEN IS THE BOMB DISPOSAL CART. IT LOOKS LIKE A LARGE, HIGH TECH BABY BUGGY WITH SHOCK ABSORBERS AND BALLOON TIRES. [I ENVISIONED A CROSS BETWEEN THE PENGUIN’S BABY CARRIAGE IN THE 2ND BATMAN MOVIE AND NOLAN’S BATMOBILE IN “BATMAN BEGINS”] THE TOP IS OPEN.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 2

POV SIDE SHOT OF MATT AND GIOVANNA STILL HOLDING HANDS, HER FACE IS ALMOST CALM, NO LONGER TERRIFIED.

MATT:

Now, let’s see if we can get this vest off of you.

PANEL 3

POV 1/3 SIDE SHOT OF SAVAGE.

SAVAGE:

Matt, how are you feeling?

PANEL 4

POV HALF BODY SHOT OF MATT, STILL HOLDING HANDS. HE IS SMILING CONFIDENTLY.

MATT:

Everything’s fine chief.

PANEL 5

POV FULL FACE SHOT OF GIOVANNA, FROWNING LIKE SHE’S CONFUSED.

GIOVANNA:

Who are you speaking to?

PAGE 13 (6 panels)

PANEL 1

POV MATT ¼ UPPER BODY SHOT, POINTING AT THE HEADSET.

MATT:

Es mi capo, my chief. He’s in my ear.

PANEL 2

POV 45 DEGREE ANGLE SHOT FROM GIOVANNA’S POV. MATT IS TAKING OFF HIS HELMET.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 3

POV MATT’S POV HE HAS PUT THE HELMET ON GIOVANNA’S HEAD. SHE LOOKS RIDICULOUS AND IS ALMOST SMILING.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 4

POV Rear shot of Savage as before except now Matt’s face fills the big screen.

MATT (electronic jagged bubble) from screen:

Say hello, Chief.

PANEL 5

POV Close up of Savage as he speaks into headset.

SAVAGE (smiling):

Ciao, Giovanna. Don’ preoccupazione di t. Matt lo proteggerà.

PANEL 6

POV Head shot of Giovanna, HER head IS dwarfed by Matt’s helmet. She is half smiling, eyes wide.

GIOVANNA:

Grazie, il signore, capo.

PAGE 14 (6 panels)

PANEL 1

POV ¾ side shot of Matt and Giovanna from her side. Matt has put his helmet back ON.

MATT:

What did you say to her, Chief?

PANEL 2

POV Savage from rear so we see Giovanna again on the big screen.

SAVAGE:

I told her not to worry. That you would protect her. So don’t make a liar out of me and get to work.

PANEL 3

POV Matt faces one of the rooftop cameras and salutes with a huge grin on his face.

MATT:

Yes sir!

PANEL 4

POV Side upper half body shot. Matt Has taken both of Giovanna’s hands in his AGAIN and is looking into her eyes.

MATT:

Now Giovanna, I want you to take a deep breath very slowly, and let it out.

PANEL 5

POV Closeup of Giovanna’s face, eyes closed AND LIPS PURSED as she exhales. Her face is calm.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 6

MATT:

Now, let’s get you out of this vest so you can go home and see your Madre e Padre.

PAGE 15 (6 panels)

PANEL 1

POV Upper body ¾ shot of Matt pulling what looks like a flashlight out of his side pouch. It has a 3 inch rectangular screen at one end and a black dome at the other and a single button in the center of the shaft.

MATT:

This is an ultrasonic scope, like they use to see babies in the hospital.

PANEL 2

POV Closer shot of scope in Matt’s hand.

MATT:

I’ll use this to see what is inside the vest so I can disarm it. Then you can go home to your family, okay?

PANEL 3

POV Closeup of Giovanna’s face, a half smile.

GIOVANNA:

Oh yes. Grazie. I would like that very much.

PANEL 4

POV The screen of the scope in foreground showing a black square blob with several black wires coming off it.

MATT:

Oh, this will be easy.

PANEL 5

POV full body shot ¾ from Matt’s POV as he has LIFTed the vest from her shoulders.

 MATT:

There, that’s better, isn’t it?

GIOVANNA (standing up straight now):

Yes, much.

PANEL 6

POV ¾ rear shot of Matt placing the vest into to the bomb cart. In the background two men are running up to take it away.

NO DIALOGUE

PAGE 16 (7 panels)

PANEL 1 (across the top of page)

POV Side shot of the two men pushing the bomb cart away from the blast shield.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 2

POV Over Matt’s shoulder, half body shot of Giovanna. Hanging around her neck is a lanyard with a small gray box about the size of a pack of cigarettes dangling from it.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 3

POV Side shot, knees up, of both Matt and Giovanna. Matt raising the scope close to the box.

MATT:

Just one more thing, and then we are finished.

PANEL 4

POV Same shot (PAGE 15, PANEL 4) of the scope screen in the foreground. This time there is a black RECTANGLE, THE battery, and half of the box is black with 2 wires coming from the top corners of the square leading to the top of the battery.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 5

POV Savage, from POV of his monitors. The background is dark and the monitor light is illuminating his face.

SAVAGE:

Matt, that looks like a plate detonator. If you try to cut one of those wires, it will go off.

MATT, a jagged voice bubble from the speaker off screen: Yeah, that’s right, Chief. I’ll pull the top off and check it out.

PANEL 6

POV Matt’s hands prying off the cover of the box. Show the cover lifted partially.

MATT:

Well, at least there’s no pressure switch.

PANEL 7

POV Closeup of the inside of the box. A small block of C-4 with a terminal at each top corner and a 9 volt battery, the positive and negative markings scratched off and THE TERMINALS ARE covered in solder. THERE’S A SMALL CIRCUIT BOARD BELOW THE BATTERY WITH A COUPLE OF RESISTORS, An illuminated GREEN LED, AND A TRANSISTOR SOLDERED TO IT. THE TWO WIRES RUN FROM THE BATTERY TO TERMINALS ON THE CIRCUIT BOARD. Both wires are the same color, a muddy brown (OR GRAY IF BLACK AND WHITE). The solder joints on each terminal ARE blobby and uneven.

NO DIALOGUE

PAGE 17 (8 panels)

PANEL 1

POV HEAD SHOT OF MATT.

MATT:

Must’ve had a sale on brown [OR GRAY, IF BLACK AND WHITE] wire at the terrorist electronics store. And look at that shoddy soldering work. These boys are real amateurs, eh, Chief?

PANEL 2

POV SAME AS PAGE 16, PANEL 5.

SAVAGE:

Be careful, Matt. I don’t like the looks of this. The biggest danger is over.

PANEL 3

POV HEAD SHOT OF MATT

SAVAGE (off panel, electronic bubble):

We can make her comfortable and bring somebody else in.

MATT:

Aw shucks, and keep this pretty little girl waiting? It’s no problem.

PANEL 4

POV HALF BODY SIDE SHOT OF MATT. HE’S PULLING A SMALL METER OUT OF HIS SIDE POUCH.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 5

POV Matt’s hands, IN ONE HAND HE’S HOLDING AN ANALOG MULTIMETER WITH A NEEDLE ON IT, reading 5 volts. THE DIAL IS SET TO DC VOLTS on the 0-10 scale. hE is CLIPPING A TINY ALLIGATOR CLIP TO ONE SIDE OF ONE OF THE RESISTORS. there’s a tiny clip on the other side of the resistor ON THE CIRCUIT BOARD.

MATT (from off panel):

All I have to do find the ballast resistor, there it is! Gotcha!

PANEL 6

MATT’S PULLING A SMALL PAIR OF PRECISION WIRE CUTTERS OUT OF HIS POUCH.

no dialogue

panel 7

CLOSE UP OF MATT’S HANDS HOLDING the wire cutters, jaws obviously open, ABOUT TO CUT THE RESISTOR CONNECTING LEAD.

MATT:

Now all I have to do is clip this little connection right here and–

PANEL 8

POV same shot as panel 7, but on Savage’s monitor, from the helmet cam and further away. the open jaws of the wire cutters hovering an inch above, not touching the RESISTOR.

PAGE 18, FULL PAGE PANEL, Last panel of Issue #1. Long shot of the blast shield as a huge explosion erupts from the center like a geyser of red and yellow and orange and black (OR GRAYS, IF BLACK AND WHITE). Might show silhouette of Matt and Giovanna SKELETONS in the center as it goes up.

sfx: WHOOM!

THE END

This is the first issue of a comic series based on a novel I am writing. Savage gets discharged from the Air Force as a result of this incident, and goes to Albuquerque to offer his condolences to Matt’s brother, Luke, who convinces him to stay in Albuquerque and become a private detective. Savage Investigations is a series of detective novels that I am writing.

Issue #2, AFTERMATH, is the second chapter of the novel. The government wants to blame the incident on Matt and deals with Savage being forced to retire from the military and assuming the blame for the deaths of Matt and Giovanna to appease the Italian government. Savage recommends Matt for the Silver Star medal for his bravery in the line of duty. Reluctantly, Colonel Harding, the Base Commander and Savage’s boss, agrees. Savage takes Matt’s Silver Star, awarded posthumously, in person to Matt’s brother in Albuquerque. The comic script for AFTERMATH has also been written and is in the final editing stages.

SAVAGE INVESTIGATIONS

Issue # 2

Aftermath

STORY BY

CHUCK LARNTZ

chuck@larntz.com

ARTWORK BY

NATHAN HENDRICKSEN

Copyright © 2005 and 2011

PAGE 1          FULL PAGE SPLASH SCREEN

POV Over Savage’s shoulder (show just his shoulder and the back of his head but focus on the video console). The SWANSON heartbeat and voiceprint screens are now straight lines. The big screen is blank and the other two screens show two vantage points of the same scene: grisly bits of body parts and blood all over the inside of the blast screen (the blast wasn’t strong enough to blow up the screen, but it’s smeared with blood and bits of bodies). The smaller screens are displaying the same scene from two angles atop the roof of the consulate so there’s no need for real detail and the main screen was Matt, who is now blown up, hence the blank screen. Show Matt’s helmet a few feet from the blast screen and maybe one of Giovanna’s Mary Jane shoes on its side.

SAVAGE: Oh my God! (big letters as an exclamation or very small letters in a big voice bubble, as if in shock—I’m kinda leaning towards the latter, more dramatic?)

PAGE 2-Three panels: One half page at the top and two quarter panels across bottom of page.

PANEL 1  (¼ page)

POV ¾ full on facing shot of Savage watching the console. His shoulders are slumped, face is devastated, horrified. Savage has one thought balloon and Mickey has one small jagged electronic speech balloon.

SAVAGE: Thought bubble: Should I have ordered him to use the bomb suit to finish the job?

MICKEY (one of Savage’s men, the acting leader on the scene): Chief? (The sound is coming from off screen in a jagged voice bubble)

PANEL 2 (¼ page)

POV ZOOM IN FROM SAME ANGLE AS PANEL ONE for HEAD SHOT OF SAVAGE. He has one thought balloon and Mickey has one electronic speech balloon.

SAVAGE: Did I just kill that kid? Those kids?

MICKEY: Chief? Are you there? (The sound is coming from off screen in a jagged voice bubble)

PANEL 3 (¼ page)

POV Mickey on the scene, holding his finger to the headset in his ear. Full body shot there’s chaos all around him with people darting everywhere. He’s still trying to raise Savage. There’s another man next to him. He’s looking at Johnny. Mickey has one balloon and Johnny has one balloon.

MICKEY: I can’t raise the Chief, Johnny.

JOHNNY: Keep tryin’, Mick. He’s gotta be there.

PANEL 4 (¼ page)

POV ¾ view facing Savage from left side, waist up. Mickey has one jagged speech balloon and Savage has one thought balloon.

MICKEY: Chief? (Same jagged voice bubble coming from off screen)

SAVAGE: Jolts to alertness (I don’t know you’re gonna draw that—maybe show him sitting up straight with action lines around his head?)

SAVAGE: Thought bubble: C’mon man, pull yourself together!

PAGE 3  Three panels, two across the top and one half page at bottom of page.

PANEL 1

POV Same as splash screen (over Savage’s other shoulder), except now monitors display men picking up bits of clothing and body parts (DON’T KNOW IF YOU WANT TO SHOW BODY PARTS) and putting them in various sizes of clear plastic ZipLoc evidence bags with a three inch horizontal red band close to the top. Show two small piles of bags, one for Matt (his helmet in a bag is in front of the pile) and one for Giovanna (show the shoe in a bag in front of her pile). (Matt’s pile is larger since he had more gear that didn’t get blown up) Remember the different angle thing. Savage has one speech balloon.

SAVAGE: I’m here, Mickey. Hold on. The secure line’s ringing.

PANEL 2

POV Close up shot of the SECURE phone on the desk. Show lower corner of monitor in upper left of frame. One of the lights on the phone panel is lit. Savage’s hand is reaching for it, forefinger extended.

NO DIALOG

PANEL 3

POV FACING Head shot of Savage, phone to his ear. Savage has one balloon and voice has one jagged balloon

SAVAGE: Savage. This is a secure line.

VOICE: Do you know who this is?

PANEL 4 Savage has two linked balloons, and VOICE has one jagged balloon between Savage’s.

POV HEAD SHOT, BUT FACING US FORWARD

SAVAGE: Yes, sir.

VOICE: And you know why I’m calling?

SAVAGE (linked speech balloon): Yes, sir.

PAGE 4  Three panels, one half page across top and two quarter pages below.

PANEL 1

POV SILHOUETTE OF A MAN FACING US, SITTING AT A DESK WITH DESK-TYPE STUFF IN FOREGROUND. HIS FACE IS IN STARK SHADOW, COVERING HIS FACE AND NECK. YOU CAN SEE THAT HE IS HOLDING A PHONE. CAN”T SEE ANY FACIAL DETAILS EXCEPT A TIE AND SUIT JACKET. HE’S THE VOICE, with one speech balloon.

VOICE: Savage, get your team out of there. I’ve called in the cleanup crew. Nobody’s there when they show up. Understood? You have 10 minutes.

PANEL 2

POV SAME AS PAGE 3, PANEL 3 Savage has one balloon

SAVAGE: Understood, sir.

PANEL 3

POV SAME AS PANEL 1. VOICE has one balloon and Savage has one jagged balloon.
VOICE: Oh, and Savage, too bad about your man.

 SAVAGE (JAGGED SPEECH BALLOON): Thank you, sir.

PAGE 5

PANEL 1 POV Close up shot of the SECURE phone on the desk. Show lower corner of monitor in upper left of frame. One of the lights on the phone panel is lit. Savage’s hand is replacing handset, hovering over the phone handset cradle

NO DIALOG

P

SAVAGE: Mickey, you’ve got 10 minutes to get as much evidence as you can and clear out.

MICKEY: Roger that. (Jagged balloon)

SAVAGE: Savage.

MAJOR JOHNSON: (Jagged bubble from phone): Chief? Sorry to hear about Swanson. Have your men clear out with what they’ve got. We’ve gotta keep a tight lid on this. Nobody speaks to anyone. Got it?

SAVAGE: Yes, sir.

PAGE 4

PANEL 1

POV Mickey is standing next to the two piles of bags holding a clipboard, writing on it. The piles are larger now.

SAVAGE (Jagged bubble coming from Mickey’s earpiece): Mickey? Time to go. Bring everything to Hanger 205. I’ll meet you there.

MICKEY: Got it, Chief. You okay? I know how tight you and Matt are, or were.

PANEL 2

POV Same as panel 3 except no phone, just Savage’s headset.

SAVAGE: Yeah. Fact is, he was EOD. We all know what that means.

MICKEY (jagged bubble from Savage’s headset): Yeah, you never know…

PANEL

POV Street shot of outside the consulate, bird’s eye view, from 20 feet high at an angle. No indication of what just happened except for a small blast hole about the size of the blast shield and a stain on the sidewalk. A small car, an old, beat up Fiat, is careening towards the blast site. Show screeching tires. There’s a transport vehicle parked next to the curb a few feet away. Two men are holding a body, one holding the shoulders and the other the lower legs, arms dangling to show that it’s a dead guy, and another is standing in front of a white cooler. There’s a red cross on the sides of the cooler.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 12

POV The car screeches up, jumping the curb, tires off the ground, to right over the spot where Matt and Giovanna were. Show skid marks behind it. The guys with the body are walking towards the car and the other guy is carrying the cooler.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 13

POV From left rear of car. Driver of the car gets out as the guys with the body are now next to the car. Cooler guy is behind the car.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 14

POV Side shot of the car from about 10 feet, and the two guys load the body behind the wheel. The cooler guy has set it down, the top is open, and he is holding a large plastic bag of blood in each hand.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 15

POV Through the driver’s window of the car. The dead guy is in the front seat, his hands on the steering wheel. Packed around him are bladders of blood and the back seat is full of explosives (boxes with caution signs on them and wires sticking out of them)

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 16

POV Long shot (100 feet) and car is exploding. Transport vehicle is gone and explosion has blown down the fence and the gate by the sidewalk. You get to show a car exploding, neat, huh? Hopefully, the reader is thinking, “What the hell is that about?”…

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 17 ½ page

POV Hangar 205, interior. Huge open space with tape lines on the floor, marking off areas where piles of ZipLoc evidence bags and other debris are neatly stacked on long folding tables. Show the same stuff as in panel 6. Savage is surveying the scene with Mickey at his side. Mickey’s holding a clipboard and handing it to Savage.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 18

POV Savage is looking at clipboard

SAVAGE: This is everything you could collect?

MICKEY: Yeah, Chief. There wasn’t much left and we had to leave in a hurry.

PANEL 19

POV Savage looking up at Mickey

SAVAGE: I don’t like it either but they were sending in a cleanup crew and I couldn’t have you guys on site when they got there.

MICKEY: I understand.

PANEL 20

POV Front shot of Mickey

MICKEY: Chief, the boys and I would like to get together to remember Matt.

PANEL 21

POV Front shot of Savage

SAVAGE: I think a team building exercise at my place is in order. Make sure everything is squared away here and we’ll meet up in an hour or so.

PANEL 22

POV same as panel 20

MICKEY: We’ll be there, Chief.

PANEL 23

Not sure how to transition to the next panel. Show Savage driving his car home or have the car waiting outside the gate to his villa  as the gate slides open? Or just go right into his living room. On the coffee table is a tray of cold cuts and rolls, bags of chips and cheese, in the center, etc. and a bar with bottles of San Pellegrino, Fanta, and glasses arranged on it in the background. The team is all seated or standing around, engaged in solemn conversation about what a great guy Matt was and what a shame, etc., etc. Show one of those atomic clocks on the wall with big numbers showing 3:30 AM

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 24

POV ¾ shot of Savage, standing with his glass raised.

SAVAGE: To Matt Swanson. I’m a better man for having known him, as are we all. You will be missed, my friend.

PANEL 25

POV Same angle, except now the team has raised glasses.

TEAM: To Matt!

PANEL 26

POV Savage’s living room. Clock now at 4:45 and the team is up and walking towards the door. Savage is holding it open. Coffee table is covered with bottles of San Pellegrino, and Fanta and other non-alcoholic beverages, glasses and party detritus (half opened bags of chips and maybe a tray of cold cuts and rolls and cheese, mostly empty, in the center, etc.) Can actually make this a couple of panels to emphasize the sadness of the team at their loss. A couple of toasts, that sort of thing. Or not.

NO DIALOGUE

PANEL 27

POV Savage leaning with his back up against the door. The room is empty and he looks very sad.

SAVAGE: (thought bubble) Oh, Matt, what could I have done to prevent this?

TWO

The primer charge went off, instantly killing Matt and the girl. Even if he were onsite, there was nothing Savage could have done.

The logical conclusion was that the timer went off or the charge was remotely detonated before Matt could disarm it. It didn’t really matter any more. Both kids were dead and Savage was wracked with guilt, even though the tragic event was out of his hands.

The reality was, it could happen to any EOD guy. It’s what their nightmares are about. The risk is all part of the job. Many of them do it for the rush of cheating Death every time they go out. But sometimes Death won’t be cheated.

On several occasions Savage had been there to save Matt’s life, and other times Matt had saved his, but he wasn’t there this time. He knew it wasn’t his fault, but he felt responsible.

Always after an op, Savage and his boys would go back and blow off some steam at Savage’s villa northwest of Sorrento. They called it a “team building exercise”, especially when they lost a member of the team. A cloud of solemnity hung over them as they sat around swapping stories and sharing memories of Matt and some even managed a few weak smiles as they shared their favorite anecdotes.

It was near dawn when the last man left and Savage fell into a fitful sleep at about four-thirty, only to be rousted out of bed at six a.m. by the telephone.

“Savage,” he said into the receiver, his voice clouded by sleep.

“Chief? This is Captain Armstrong. Colonel Harding requests that you report to him this morning at seven.”

“Yes sir,” he said, shaking the cobwebs from his consciousness. “I’ll be there.”

He hung up and dragged himself into the shower.

He arrived in the outer office of Colonel Richard Harding, the installation commander and Savage’s direct superior.

“Go right in, Chief,” Captain Armstrong said without looking up from his desk. He wanted to express his condolences about what happened but felt that he would be rubbing salt into a fresh wound so he chose to say nothing.

“Thank you, sir,” Savage said as he passed Armstrong’s desk.

Harding’s door was closed. Savage stopped in front of it for a moment to compose himself.

He rapped once on the door.

“Enter!” came the brusque reply from the inner office.

Savage took a deep breath and let it out slowly before he twisted the door handle and entered.

He noticed that the two chairs that normally were set at angles to each other across from Harding’s desk were gone. They had been replaced by a lone chair, placed six feet away from the front and center of Harding’s desk. This was not to be a social visit. The positioning of the chair said that this was to be a military interrogation.

Savage wasn’t feeling very sharp and squared away when he snapped to attention in front of Harding’s desk at 6:59 with a sharp salute and a curt, “Sergeant Savage reporting as ordered, sir!”

“Sit down, Savage,” Colonel Richard Harding said from behind his huge cherry wood desk. Harding was the base commander and as such, responsible for everything that happened with respect to the U.S. military under his command.

“You want some coffee?” he asked. The tone of his voice was strictly business.

Savage sat at attention in the lone chair across from the colonel’s desk. “No, thank you, sir,” he replied smartly.

“Relax, Drake. We need to talk,” the colonel began.

“I understand, sir.” Savage knew what was coming. The report that Harding was about to reference was the hardest document he had ever filed, especially at three in the morning after the tragedy that took the life of someone he had grown so fond of.

Harding was angry and it flashed in his eyes.

“Your report on the fiasco that went down last night. As you know, the Italian government wants someone to answer for that girl’s death.

“What the hell were you thinking, allowing Swanson to go in without the bomb suit?”

“Sir, as it states in my report, there wasn’t time and in my opinion, the situation warranted the breach of regulations.”

“All right, I’m willing to overlook that for now, but you and I both know Swanson cut the wrong wire. It’s obvious to me that it was a mistake, yet there’s nothing in your report that says so, and you want to give him the Medal of Honor? Why?”

 “Permission to speak freely, sir?”

Savage was a Chief Master Sergeant and had achieved as much rank as possible in the enlisted ranks as an E-9. He had five years more experience than the colonel and at age 43, was a year older, but Harding was an O-6 and military protocol dictated that an enlisted person always deferred to an officer, even if he were a wet-behind-the-ears, Second Lieutenant, an O-1, when in uniform. Though an O-1 would rarely question a Chief, if he was smart.

Since they were in uniform and Savage had been summoned to report to the colonel, all protocols had to be followed. Had they been on the golf course or at the club together out of uniform, as was often the case, they would have been on a first name basis. Permission to speak freely took them off the record.

“Of course, Drake.”

Savage rose from the chair and walked up to the desk. He leaned across the desk on his hands, a foot away from Harding.

“Rich, I don’t believe it was a mistake. Matt Swanson was not at fault. I think he is–was–the best EOD guy in the business, with more citations for bravery and excellence than almost anyone I know. He died in the commission of his duty. I’m pushing for the MoH. If we say he made a mistake, he won’t get it. I can’t let that happen. The only conclusion that I can come up with was that there was a timer, and thank God he managed to disable the vest before it blew.

“I’m afraid we will never know the truth, though,” Savage said.

Harding held up a DVD.

“This is a copy of the events as they happened,” he said, sliding the DVD into the computer on his desk. He used the mouse to activate the video display on the monitor. The screen came to life and showed a split screen display of each of the monitors that Savage had seen last night. Harding clicked the mouse again and the displays froze.

“Swanson’s reputation is not the issue here,” Harding said. “Hell, I recommended him for some of those citations. The fact is, somebody is going to get hung out to dry on this. If it’s not Swanson, as the OPCOM, it’ll be you.”

“So be it. I’m responsible. I was the one in charge.”

“Drake, be reasonable. The kid is dead already and you throwing yourself on this sword isn’t going to bring him back.”

“Rich, can I show you something?”

Harding slid his chair away from his desk and Savage walked around behind it and took control of the computer. He sped up the recording to the point just before Matt had tried to cut the wires.

“Now watch this, and listen carefully,” Savage said.

He pressed a key and the static display came to life and Savage’s voice came from the speakers.

““Matt, if you don’t think you can do it, leave it alone. The majority of the bomb has been disabled. We can make her comfortable and bring in somebody else. She’s relatively safe now,” Savage cautioned.

“Aw shucks, Chief, and leave this pretty little girl wired to explode? I couldn’t do that. There’s nothing to it. It’s a matter of pride, y’know? Looks like I just gotta cut this—“.

Savage held up his finger.

“There! Did you hear it?”

“Hear what?” Harding said, confused.

“The click of the dykes that he used to cut the wire with. Did you hear it?”

“I don’t know. Play it again.”

Savage rewound and played the scene again, grimacing when the one screen went blank and the others showed the explosion.

“Now, listen,” Savage turned up the volume on the speakers connected to the computer.

Again the scene repeated on the monitor.

Just before Matt spoke, Savage said, “Now listen for the click of the wire cutters.”

The scene played out and Savage asked, “Did you hear it?”

“I didn’t hear anything,” Harding admitted.

“Exactly!” Savage exclaimed. “You didn’t hear it because he never got the chance to cut the wire. The thing went off before he could disarm it!”

Harding looked thoughtful.

“You might be right, Drake, but it still looks like he cut the wrong wire, and the Italians are going to want someone’s head for this.”

“We can’t let them have Matt’s,” Savage said.

“Look, Matt died bravely and I can’t, in good conscience, let his death go unrewarded. How would I ever sleep at night?”

“We both know what they are going to say happened. He was nervous because she was a diplomat’s daughter and he choked,” Harding insisted.

“I don’t think so. He didn’t seem that nervous to me. I didn’t hear it in his voice. Matt Swanson’s been part of my team for five years, Rich. His voice monitor showed normal right up until he went for the battery wire. In fact, I don’t think he ever had a chance to cut that wire.

“I believe he knew what he was doing and the primer charge was triggered by the timer or somebody set it off remotely. He said it was a poorly rigged device. It might have even gone off prematurely.

“Imagine what would have happened if he hadn’t first disabled the main charge. Instead of a big hole in front of the gate, we would have lost the whole building. For that, he is a hero.

“It was an accident. It wasn’t Matt Swanson’s fault. I want him to get the Medal of Honor. He deserves it. His memory will not be tainted on my watch!”

Savage felt his emotions rise and he realized he had balled up his fists. Harding noticed, too.

“Look, Drake, somebody is going down for this and I don’t want it to be you, Harding pleaded. “You’ve had a long and distinguished career. I heard you tell him to leave it alone. He was being insubordinate.”

“Sir, with all due respect,” Savage said, regaining control and switching back to military protocol to make his point, “neither of us was there and we can’t decide that he screwed up. Everything was going fine until the bomb went off. I could hear it in his voice. He was not nervous or hesitant. He also said that it wasn’t anything he couldn’t handle. I never heard the click of the snips as he cut the wire. That’s what I want the record to state.

“If the Italians need someone to blame, use me. Give me an Article 15. Take one of my stripes. Force me to retire. I have enough time in.”

The colonel thought for a moment, weighing all the factors. This was going to be a political hornet’s nest unless he could find a scapegoat to give to the Italian authorities. The Office of Special Investigations, or OSI, and the Black Ops boys had already started the cover up, so a long, drawn out, thorough, public investigation was going to be out of the question.

Savage was literally offering his own neck to the chopping block and Harding had to decide whether or not to drop the axe. One of the rights and responsibilities of a high level position in the military such as a base commander is the ability to perform both field promotions and demotions in the form of an Article 15, non judicial punishment. Savage’s offer would be the perfect way out of this mess.

Harding didn’t want Savage to be drummed out of the military, given his spotless record, but he knew and respected Savage well enough to accede to his wishes. He made his decision.

“All right, Chief. If that’s the way you want it. Effective immediately, you are out-processing for retirement. I hate to do it, but I’m going to have to take a stripe.

“I hope it’s enough to satisfy that girl’s father,” Harding added.

“So do I,” Savage said but he knew it would be. One of the less glamorous aspects of being a diplomat was knowing that something might happen to a loved one, which is why they were so well guarded around the clock. A covert investigation would reveal exactly what happened to the girl’s security people, but he also knew that he would probably never know the truth, not being privy to such information any longer.

The official story for the media was that a suicide car bomb blew up on the steps of the embassy. The cleanup crew, whose job it was to rewrite history and cover up what actually happened, hosed down the site, brought in a car, loaded with explosives and a cadaver behind the wheel. Then they blew it up at the front gate right after Savage’s crew left, and swore everyone to secrecy. An hour later, it was all over the major wire services and television.

The world’s televisions all carried the same story, “A new terrorist group, Crimson Jihad, is claiming responsibility for the suicide bombing of our embassy in retaliation for the American air bases and military presence in the Middle East. Fortunately, due to the late hour of the attack, there were no casualties.”

“Crimson Jihad, eh?” Savage thought to himself. “Probably an Army Captain who’s an Arab translator. And why, with all the modern technology and advances in audio in the world, does it sound like it was recorded in a bathroom somewhere?”

He wasn’t wrong by much. The voice of Crimson Jihad was actually an Arab speaking U.S. Army lieutenant, recorded on a cheap cassette recorder his mouth too close to the microphone in a bathroom stall. The tape was sent to the embassy and released to the media. The attack would be viewed as another skirmish in the war on terrorism.

Nothing was ever reported about the abduction of Giovanna Francelli. Neither government wanted anybody getting ideas about kidnapping the daughters of other diplomats. Only a handful of people knew what had actually occurred. The tragic death of the young girl and the brave young man who tried to save her was a story that would forever be shrouded in secrecy.

Savage was fed up anyway.

“23 years in the military, 18 of it in black ops, I’ve lost enough close friends, and have had enough killing and death and subterfuge about cover stories that covered up what really happened,” he thought with bitterness in his heart.

As ordered, he put in his papers to retire. Harding taking one of his stripes meant he would retire as a Senior Master Sergeant, although he would still receive the full retirement pay of a Chief and it would still say “CMSGT / E9” in the “PAY GRADE” field on his blue retired ID card.

Someone else would have to watch over his boys now. They all came over to his place for a somber farewell gathering and each man let him know that they respected and understood why Savage had done what he did. They toasted Matt Swanson one last time as a team.

Savage knew he’d miss the life and the comradery that exists nowhere else but the military, but it was time to move on.

Though unprecedented, Colonel Harding granted Savage’s final request to take Matt’s Medal of Honor to Albuquerque and give his condolences to Matt’s brother, Luke Swanson, personally.

Savage was to complete his final out-processing at Dover Air Force Base, Delaware, and a few days later, his military career would be a memory. He had about twenty thousand dollars in a 401K, and his future was, for the first time in a very long time, uncertain.

Rex Danger: P.I.

0

Meet Rex Danger

Our hero, Rex used to be a Detective Sergeant on the city police force. He was on the fast track to make Detective Lieutenant, missed passing the test by one lousy point, but that went awry when $5,000 in drug evidence money came up missing with his pawprints all over it. He was forced to resign in shame—either that or go to jail. Now he’s a private eye, and still on the lookout for whoever it was that framed him. He doesn’t have a very good relationship with law enforcement and tries to keep his head down and stay out of trouble, but trouble has a way of finding him anyway. The only friend he’s got on the force is his old pal Shep MacDougal, Mac, to his friends . Mac and Rex have known each other since they were pups and went to the police academy together, finished in the top one percent of their class. Now Mac is top dog at the precinct as a Captain, but he and Rex are still close.

 THE CASE AGAINST REX DANGER

SCOTTY                                 DUKE                   SPIKE

                      MAC                              LUCKY

 

POV See the dogs playing poker painting. Mac and Scotty, a Scottish Terrier, Duke, a Labrador Retriever, Lucky, a Collie, and Spike, a Doberman, are sitting around a poker table.

MAC

I keep telling you, he didn’t do it.

DUKE

Oh, here we go.

SCOTTY 

Yeah, that’s what you’ve been sayin’ all along, Mac, but the fact is it was his name and signature on the sign out sheet, and his snout on the video.

DUKE

Did everybody ante up the kitty?

SCOTTY

If he didn’t take the five G’s, then who did?

MAC

“I don’t know, but I’m telling you it wasn’t him. We’ve been pals since we were pups.

MAC

It must have been somebody else. They never did get a good shot of his face.”

SCOTTY

“So you think it was somebody else on the video? Somebody else wearing the same trench coat, with his markings, and the same stupid hat?”

MAC

“Yeah, that’s what I’m saying. Anybody could get a hat like that, and the coat, too.”

MAC

Whoever it was kept their face out of the camera range and had the hat pulled down to cover his snout. That’s pretty suspicious, you ask me.

MAC

Rex Danger was framed for taking that five thousand dollars out of the evidence room. He wouldn’t throw away his career for a lousy five G’s. The guy was on the fast track to make Lieutenant.

MAC

He only missed the test by one point. It ought to be him wearing this lieutenant bar, not me.  He had too much going on risk his badge for something so stupid.”

DUKE

“Look, you guys gonna play cards or sit around going over ancient history? You gonna call, or what, Scotty?”

SCOTTY

Yeah, don’t get your tail in a twist, Duke. I call.

SCOTTY

“Look, Mac, all I know is what the Internal Affairs inquest found out and your pal got caught with his paw in the cookie jar. End of story.

SCOTTY

You ask me, he should have been thrown in jail, not just kicked off the force. We got a word for dogs that steal—dirty. Rex Danger is a dirty dog and that’s that.”

SPIKE 

“Y’know, just once I’d like to sit down to a nice game of cards and not have to prove the guilt or innocence of Rex Danger.

SPIKE

Me, I liked the mutt, but Internal Affairs did the investigation, and they found him dirty.

SPIKE

Bottom line, neither of us was there and all we got to go on is what he says and the evidence against him. I.A. says he’s dirty, I gotta go with the pack.

LUCKY

“Yeah, Mac, you might wanna be careful about what you say. Rumor is the big brass is gonna start sniffin’ around you, too. Just sayin’, you might wanna muzzle yourself when it comes to this.

LUCKY

Danger wouldn’t want you to risk your career, stickin’ up for him. I like the mutt, too, but you don’t see me risking my 20 years on the force, chasin’ after a car I ain’t never gonna catch, y’know?

MAC

Bring ‘em on. My record’s clean.

LUCKY

Yeah, so was Rex Danger’s.

Joss Whedon v Warren Ellis, 2-16-2006

0

What follows needs no introduction. Here’s one anyway: Mr. Ellis wrote a rant about San Diego Comic Con which caused Mr. Whedon to take umbrage…

Nerd Prom indeed!

The Long March To Nerd Prom Begins

February 16th, 2006 | comics talk

Every hotel room in southern California was booked within eighteen femtoseconds of the San Diego Comics Convention reservations webpage being uploaded. That’s it, people. If you didn’t get your booking confirmed within eighteeen femtoseconds of the starting pistol, you’re screwed. Because there are one hundred thousand hungry people out there who need to attend San Diego Comics Convention in order to walk right past all that comics shit and go straight to sniffing Brandon Routh’s cricketbox, sending bits of themselves to the cast of SERENITY and masturbating ferociously in the men’s stalls while wearing V FOR VENDETTA masks and discounted Hulk Hands.

No, of course I’m not going.

Nerd Prom: It Begins Now. Never forget.

[TAGS]nerdprom, nerd+prom, sdcc, comicon[/TAGS]


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73 Responses to “The Long March To Nerd Prom Begins”

  1. Lady DaggerFebruary 15th, 2006 at 10:51 pm

Egads is it that scary there?
I keep debating going this year, and getting an art space in the artshow. Or if it would be worth it.
I’ve been wanting to go every year for the past 15 or so years, but something always prevents.
I saw the pix from last year in your Flikr acount..
Damn atleast at DCon the costumes apear much better.

Is the guy in the above photo an artist there?!?

  1. JimmyTheHutt- February 15th, 2006 at 11:06 pm

And people wonder I went once, and will NEVER go back…

I was working a table at the 2002 Con. Our table was right near the local Star Wars fanboy table, and one of the wannabe jedi was consistently oggling one of the girls there with me. When I left to go get some coffee from the Starbucks, he made is pass.

It went something like this:

“Can I take your picture? Your hair is….pretty.”

Thr girl in question promptly left and refused to go back.

  1. Jeff P.February 16th, 2006 at 12:06 am

I’m bringing my woman to NY Comic con in two weeks. She’s been to proper SF cons, like Worldcons and the book-centric Readercon, but never a full blown comic convention. She asked “Is there a big difference?”

  1. Joss Whedon- February 16th, 2006 at 12:39 am

Who is this Ellis guy anyway? He thinks he all that cuz he wroted “Planety”. The facts is, KomiKon is AWESOME becuz people dress up like stuff — but nobody dresses like Warner Ellis, I guess, mister sour grapes. I talked to Sumner Glou and she said nobody ever mailed her body parts except for one time an arm and then a messenger brought her a thyroid gland but big deal, SERENDIPITY fans happen to be the most tastefullest fans who have extra or redundant body parts.

The best thing about Comicvention is the girls are pretty and the younglings are pretty (is that a legal issue?) and the men is pretty when they are Jedi but not so much Sith. I like to meet the Comedy Books artists (Not everyone wants to meet Angelina Michelle Watts, you know) and to buy a picture of an elf or dragon already. So stay off this grumpity webcamsite becuz Warner Ellis is just a grouchypants! I met a real General Griefuss, who amongst you can say that?

Peace, dog.

  1. Joss Whedon- February 16th, 2006 at 12:44 am

Altho that hulk hands thing was me. Sorry. Romulan Ale.

  1. warrenellisFebruary 16th, 2006 at 1:03 am

..see, that could actually BE Joss…

Or possibly Steven E McDonald.

  1. warrenellisFebruary 16th, 2006 at 3:38 pm

Nope, turns out that was Joss. I mention this to settle down the dozens of people clicking here from Whedonesque.

There will, of course, be revenge.

  1. GordonFebruary 16th, 2006 at 3:42 pm

Do you smell that? It’s fanboy, son. Nothing else on the world smells like that.

  1. Warrenellis.com » Joss Whedon Schools Me In The Way Of The NerdFebruary 16th, 2006 at 4:51 pm

[…] Found in the comments section of this post and later copped-to in email: Who is this Ellis guy anyway? He thinks he all that cuz he wroted “Planety”. The facts is, KomiKon is AWESOME becuz people dress up like stuff — but nobody dresses like Warner Ellis, I guess, mister sour grapes. I talked to Sumner Glou and she said nobody ever mailed her body parts except for one time an arm and then a messenger brought her a thyroid gland but big deal, SERENDIPITY fans happen to be the most tastefullest fans who have extra or redundant body parts. […]

  1. Joss Whedon- February 16th, 2006 at 5:31 pm

Revenge, eh? So, mister Ellis — (swishes brandy in large glass) — let the games begin, unless they are games of skill, or physical exertion of any kind, or with math. I know the bitter bitter truth, why you are so threatened by my genius, my, class, my big glass of brandy. It’s because you’re so OLD, so terribly terribly OLD, isn’t it! Mountains were hills when you were middle-aged. I hear you left your wife for a younger, trophy Cromagnon. And that you’re… that a young person would find you strange, and… from many years of… you being… DAMN! This round to you, Ellis. But the game is far –(drains Brandy, gasps like beached whale) — from over.

  1. mattblackFebruary 16th, 2006 at 5:42 pm

Well, after killing network television he’s moved on to killing the internet. Which will hopefully be just as entertaining.

  1. warrenellisFebruary 16th, 2006 at 5:50 pm

I am twenty years younger than Joss Whedon.

Also, HE cannot hide things in his beard.

…of course, he can pay people to do that for him now. He can even pay people to grow the beard for him. And he doesn’t have to run his own website to look big and clever on the internets.

Ah, shit.

  1. Joss Whedon- February 16th, 2006 at 6:07 pm

All right, Ellis, I am a couple of decades older than you. Touche. But you don’t know all of it. Jeph Loebi-Wan never told you the truth about your father…

Yes. You’re my youngling. Oh for chrissake, everybody knows it but you! Even my beard-growers speak of it freely! Now join me and together we can rule an infintisinimimmsally tiny portion of the galaxy and have a mildly amusing interweb flame war! If you only knew the power of the Hack Side! Join me. Seriously. I’ll cut off your other hand, you pansy.

  1. Storm_dancerFebruary 16th, 2006 at 6:11 pm

Boys, boys… don’t fight! I have an idea! DO join up, and write some comics TOGETHER. Deliciously twisted plots and characters, touching moments of hilarity… it.. would… be… og… crap. Fangasm. Now I have to change.

  1. warrenellisFebruary 16th, 2006 at 6:30 pm

Every time you say “youngling”, I throw up in my mouth a little bit. And look around to see if John Munch from SVU is in the room.

Look, everybody. Joss and Warren are avoiding writing.

  1. R.S.- February 16th, 2006 at 6:37 pm

I always suspiciousized that Warren Ellis was the bastard offspring of the Joss….

  1. Joss Whedon- February 16th, 2006 at 6:39 pm

Are you kidding? This is the most writing I’ve done in months.

(Warner Brothers execs don’t come here, do they?)

  1. Chilli815- February 16th, 2006 at 6:55 pm

Okay – this is a geek out moment!

  1. Shpedoinkle- February 16th, 2006 at 7:00 pm

Holy Procrastination! I love it! Hey Joss, as long as you’re slackin’, come over to Whedonesque – we need more – uh – you!

  1. Chilli815- February 16th, 2006 at 7:03 pm

No Joss. Stay here. Independant comedy.

Plus Whedoneqsue kinda scares me, what with the black and all. I’m not a Firefly, I need colour and sound!

  1. EdDantes- February 16th, 2006 at 7:04 pm

Yep…..fans everywhere are having mindgasms in front of their computers… Oops, there goes another one.

  1. Henry- February 16th, 2006 at 7:04 pm

Sounds like everything would be swell if they just ‘fessed up their feelings for one another and asked each other out to the Nerd Prom already. Won’t anybody think of the children??

  1. Kessie- February 16th, 2006 at 7:05 pm

Warner Brothers execs? Did I miss something? *sits and waits for the show to continue*

  1. Andrew Rackstraw- February 16th, 2006 at 7:09 pm

Despite being about three times my age (ha!,) Joss Whedon sounds (in interwebspeak) pretty much exactly like me.

Lucky, lucky Joss.

  1. warrenellisFebruary 16th, 2006 at 7:15 pm

Good god, man. Why would Warner Bros execs want to be anywhere near me? Back when we were doing GLOBAL FREQUENCY I used to hear them slip the condom over the phone before they even spoke to me.

I’m going to start a rumour that you’re attending San Diego dressed as Wonder Woman.

And that they will know you by your beard.

  1. Shpedoinkle- February 16th, 2006 at 7:21 pm

… of the “full and manly” kind?

  1. Joss Whedon- February 16th, 2006 at 7:26 pm

Okay, can nobody type any more words that end in ‘gasm’? I makes me feel not so good.

The truth is, Ellis is just afraid to say what this is REALLY about. Cassaday. Right, Ellis? He’s drawing Planety AND Admonishing X-mens (now with 17% more Wolverine!) and you hate me for it. You’ve always been jealous — you started your book just to steal him from me — which was idiotic since I didn’t meet him till several years after! Ha! Seriously, Warner, we’re tearing little Johnny apart. Let’s bury the hatchet. Come to the Con with me. Yes, you can dress like Puffy YumiAmi or whatever that thing is you have that outfit of. We’ll have a blast. I’m buyin’ the lead-based food that you have to wait four hours in line for and then rips out of your stomach like you’re John Hurt, and I’ll even buy you a comic. Plus I hear Brandon Routh might be there! He’s dreamy.

  1. Joss Whedon- February 16th, 2006 at 7:29 pm

Wow, we both went right to the cross-dressing humor! This is just like the Algonquin round table, except there’s only two of us, and no table, and no particular surfeit of wit, and no great certainty about how spell ‘Algonquin’. Huzzah!

  1. James- February 16th, 2006 at 7:32 pm

I am in the same message thread as both Warren Ellis AND Joss Whedon. I am vicariously famous. Twice.

  1. Rynn- February 16th, 2006 at 7:32 pm

Is it my birthday? ‘cos I feel like I’m getting a gift that doesn’t end in ‘gasm’ (as far as you know.)

Teehee, I’m naughty.

  1. warrenellisFebruary 16th, 2006 at 7:34 pm

When Cassaday masturbates at night in that cell under Joe Quesada’s house HE STILL SAYS
MY NAME NOT YOURS MINE MINE MINE

cough.

Astronomical X-Cash is a very popular book, and I like that Johnny has enough money now for things like hair products and food.

And it’s a Sailor Moon suit, you bastard. Because I hear Brandon Routh is into that. And possibly Nathan Fillion.

The last time I was at San Diego, I saw a porn star being bitched out by a midget pimp. Who was not a pimp of midgets, but a midget who was also a pimp.

Your tv show FIREFOX should have had midget pimps in it.

Is that a guy from The CW I see over there?

  1. Stefan HaydenFebruary 16th, 2006 at 7:35 pm

yeah. the web needs more bickering from stars. This is clearly more amusing then anything Gawker could put out. go Joss go!

  1. warrenellisFebruary 16th, 2006 at 7:35 pm

I tell you, we should be putting the word “wit” in inverted commas, before the EFF come after us for intarwub fraud or something…

  1. David Pyke- February 16th, 2006 at 7:37 pm

Hmmm… Ellis and Whedon both going into cross-dressing “cosplay” and both having beards.

I knew it! They’re both the same person with a penchant for young girls and Anime! Thus begins the revolution! WarJossEliDon for emperor!

  1. Stefan HaydenFebruary 16th, 2006 at 7:38 pm

Let’s not bad mouth the EFF…. 😛

  1. Joss Whedon- February 16th, 2006 at 7:40 pm

“Anglosaxon X-tracrispy” happens to be ART, you slug, unlike “Globular Frequenting”.

But the Cassaday thing is true. Joe says it’s freaking his kids out.

  1. Henry- February 16th, 2006 at 7:43 pm

The sex tapes that will come out of this cross-dressing, nerd-prom attending date will be worth approximately eleventy billion.

Ze goggles do nozhing!

  1. warrenellisFebruary 16th, 2006 at 7:46 pm

I dunno why Joe doesn’t just put the cock-gag back in young Cassaday’s mouth. It muffles the
noise, and I think he got to quite like it.

And it’s all he deserves for flouncing off with some poncy Hollywood type to go and draw Anaesthetic X-Wipes.

I should have given him more barely-contained breasts and large shiny Russian gay porn stars to draw.

Oh, God.

I’m so alone.

Hold me.

  1. Tyler- February 16th, 2006 at 7:48 pm

Man, this is just ten different kinds off geek-borne happiness right here. Two of my favorite comic-mkaer-people trading teh funnay right in front of me. Thank God for strep.

  1. R.S.- February 16th, 2006 at 7:49 pm

Is ‘inverted commas’ some freaky UK way of saying quotation marks? Joss, teach this man how to write American!

  1. Hawk- February 16th, 2006 at 7:49 pm

Twenty bucks says they’re both chatting on the same computer in Batman and Spiderman underoos.

  1. Joe Q.February 16th, 2006 at 7:53 pm

GET BACK TO WORK!

*Lights cuban cigar with 100$ dollar bill*

  1. Princess of Darkness- February 16th, 2006 at 7:53 pm

Now that sounds like fun.

@henry: ebay would break down *g*

  1. Hawk- February 16th, 2006 at 7:58 pm

Yes, sir Mr. Joe Q. *goes back to licking Joe Q.’s shoes clean*

  1. Jason LindquistFebruary 16th, 2006 at 7:58 pm

Who is illustrating this script? Maybe Jeffrey Rowland or Bryan Lee O’Malley?

  1. Shadow DuchessFebruary 16th, 2006 at 7:59 pm

I think I’ve just stumbled upon a bizarre alternate Universe where cross dressing midget pimps are handing out prom dates for free for the nerd contingency.
My query is, if J.W or W.E. dress up as their favorite female style avengers will there be photographic evidence and where will the opium den of pulchritude be as I sure as hell want to see this in person.

  1. Joss Whedon- February 16th, 2006 at 7:59 pm

Well, this has been educational. But it’s hard to type while I’m holding Warren. So on to greater things. Lunch things. May the Federation be with you, or something. Nerds.

  1. warrenellisFebruary 16th, 2006 at 8:01 pm

Move your hand, Joss. Yes.

If you loved me, you’d hold me THERE.

Time for a cigarette. Take it easy, people.

  1. DavidFebruary 16th, 2006 at 8:01 pm

So long Joss, and thanks for all the fish!

  1. Hawk- February 16th, 2006 at 8:02 pm

I knew reach-arounds will be happening!!!

  1. Stefan Hayden » Blog Archive » Joss Whedon vs Warren Ellis in funny comment flame war — Graphic Artist, Technophile, Web Librarian, Embarrassingly cute spelling mistakes.February 16th, 2006 at 8:48 pm

[…] This is only internet history for the few. if you love Joss Whedon, Warren Ellis, FireFly, or just comics in general you have to read this comment war between Joss and Warren. It has to be one of the most exciting things I’ve seen unfold before me I have ever witnessed. […]

  1. JAFB » Holy shit this is funnyFebruary 16th, 2006 at 8:59 pm

[…] And a little scary. Watch Warren Ellis and Joss Whedon go back and forth in WarrenEllis.com’s comment section. […]

  1. Katzenleben » Blog Archive » Oh. My. Goodness.February 17th, 2006 at 12:27 am

[…] If you want to see read Joss Whedon and Warren Ellis playing mind games you should go here. Start your reading with the fourth comment. I didn’t manage to read the whole thing for I was in danger of falling of my chair. […]

  1. darkparkFebruary 17th, 2006 at 1:34 am

[…] Warren insults Comic con geeks. Joss replies. Who will win? I’m torn. On the one hand, Transmet. On the other hand, Buffy. Spider, Spike. Difficult, this is. I have to go with Warren Ellis. He’s got the cane. No Comments so far Leave a comment Line and paragraph breaks automatic, e-mail address never displayed, HTML allowed: <a href=”” title=””> <abbr title=””> <acronym title=””> <b> <blockquote cite=””> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong> […]

  1. Crooked Timber » » You can’t spell ‘Algonquin’ without the ‘Whedoneqsue’February 17th, 2006 at 3:48 am

[…] Normally I do my comicsblogging at J&B. But this is just too important. (Tip to Farber, who also provides an executive summary, which unaccountably omits discounted Hulk Hands in the bathroom stall.) posted on Thursday, February 16th, 2006 at 10:45 pm Post a comment […]

  1. [Stumblings in the dark] » Joss & Warren, together again for the first timeFebruary 17th, 2006 at 4:42 am

[…] It’s the best thing Warren Ellis has done in ages! […]

  1. revolution34 » Blog Archive » Ellis vs Whedon – to the deathFebruary 17th, 2006 at 10:08 am

[…] For those of you who were wondering what procratinating comics writers get up to. Hint: It’s not watching Diagnosis: Murder… […]

  1. Just another Aussie in Scotland » Joss & Warren Ellis in interwebnet flameoutFebruary 17th, 2006 at 10:40 am

[…] http://www.warrenellis.com/?p=1848 […]

  1. Baggage Carousel 4 » Blog Archive » X-mens (now with 17% more Wolverine)February 17th, 2006 at 12:32 pm

[…] jacob directed me to the comment thread of this post on warrenellis.com. it’s a good thing i’ve already had breakfast; i would’ve snarfed my milk. Explore posts in the same categories: absurd, random […]

  1. Assorted Nonsense » Joss Whedon and Warren Ellis at War… Sort ofFebruary 17th, 2006 at 4:59 pm

[…] I have no idea who Warren Ellis is… yet another reflection of my essential lack of adequate nerddom, no doubt… but it’s fun to read him go head to head with Joss Whedon in the comments section of this post. […]

  1. John Judy’s Blog » Blog Archive » A Great Way to Start the DayFebruary 17th, 2006 at 5:25 pm

[…] My buddy Richard sent me this link to a tongue in cheek flame war between two very funny creative types: Joss Whedon and Warren Ellis. […]

  1. Shane Neville | Media Pusher and Addict – Wicked Awesome Boogaloo » Geek OffFebruary 17th, 2006 at 9:25 pm

[…] Geek Off By Shane Neville Joss Wheddon has dropped the gauntlet in a geek off against Warren Ellis. The resulting mayhem is a true match-up of geek-fu. This entry is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site. Leave a Reply […]

  1. Alas, a blog » Blog Archive » Link Farm and Open Thread #10February 17th, 2006 at 10:02 pm

[…] Warren Ellis and Joss Whedon Provide Fan Service, Oh My Yes They Do If you don’t know who both those people are, then I’m geekier than you. (Curtsy: Crooked Timber). […]

  1. nixsight » Ellis V Whedon: The Brawl to End Them All!February 20th, 2006 at 11:56 am

[…] Visit Warren Ellis […]

  1. Zona Negativa » SN: Wikkipedia, Gail Simone, Byrne, Gail Simone again y ¿Rich Johnston? + Ellis vs. Wheddon.February 23rd, 2006 at 2:06 pm

[…] Warren Ellis, comentaba la pasada Comic-Con de San Francisco y los atuendos que llevaba la gente, (de verdad, espantosos algunos) en su Blog, y en estas que aparece Josh Wheddon, y empieza a criticar, con muchísima sorna y gracia al británico. Diversos foreros también se suman a este debate y de el rescataremos algunas de las coñas mas memorables. […]

  1. Sicco Per Vetus » Whedon vs. WarrenFebruary 25th, 2006 at 8:38 am

[…] Not that, well, anybody but me would get this, let alone care, but I found it so hysterically funny, I had to post it… Joss Whedon (Geek God) and Warren Ellis (also a Geek God, and writer of some absolutely fantabulous comics) get into a flame-war on Warren’s blog. Wow. I’m still chortling. Tags […]

  1. Ghost of a fleaFebruary 27th, 2006 at 1:40 pm

Joss Whedon v Warren Ellis

Warren Ellis has come choice complaints about the San Diego Comics Convention. Joss Whedon replies in the comments (via average-bear). For example: Who is this Ellis guy anyway? He thinks he all that cuz he wroted “Planety”. The facts is,…

  1. Czeltic Girl » It’s on nowFebruary 27th, 2006 at 10:55 pm

[…] Warren Ellis: The Long March to Nerd Prom […]

  1. sure as hell ain’t mrs. stowe » …April 23rd, 2006 at 10:16 pm

[…] Warren Ellis, to Joss Whedon: “Your tv show FIREFOX should have had midget pimps in it.” It’s actually for real. *points* […]

  1. atypicalgeekMay 15th, 2006 at 7:37 am

Whedon vs. Warren

Not that, well, anybody but me would get this, let alone care, but I found it so hysterically funny, I had to post it… Joss Whedon (Geek God) and Warren Ellis (also a Geek God, and writer of some absolutely fantabulous comics) get into a flame-wa…

  1. dan : Lots of little thingsMay 16th, 2006 at 8:28 pm

[…] Warren Ellis and Joss Whedon got into a bit of a *** fight in a thread on Warren’s forums. Comment 17 is cracking…. […]

  1. First Time Flowing » Blog Archive » Whedon vs. EllisJanuary 12th, 2007 at 12:42 am

[…] This is fantastic: two of my favorite writers are having a verbal battle of wits over on Warren Ellis’ blog. […]

  1. Warren vs Whedon – Broken Kode TestAugust 26th, 2008 at 7:43 am

[…] Warren writes about some bollocks (didn’t even bother to read his actual post). Go straight to comments section where there’s a seriously funny exchange between him and Joss Whedon. Tagged: Internet Feed for this Entry […]

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